5 Things You Need To Do To Get Women In 2012

Great advice and tips Marnie,

Definitely the way to go for the 2012 and beyond.

Thanks for sharing.

I can understand why a woman might test a man for persistence to see if he is really interested or not, but here’s where I hit a block. I understand that I don’t have to worry about being feared if I don’t call day after day, act needy, get upset. But I don’t want to sound like a broken record, either. And when a woman acts interested but has a busy schedule can almost never find time to get together, I have to strategize to stay interesting. I make infrequent visits to stop in and say hello, wish her a happy holiday, etc., but totally unpredictably, often after waiting a month or two. Sure, I realize amy one woman in this situation could move away, get involved with someone else, etc., but what other choice is there?

I have what some would call a lucky problem, so I may not get sympathy.

I’ve read on OK Cupid’s blog that far and above the #1 thing women look for in a man is height. Anecdotally, I’ve observed this on other dating sites too: whenever you look at a hot girl’s profile, the very first thing they say on their ideal description of the man their looking for is, “Tall,” “Must be Tall,” “Please, only TALL men,” or they get very specific, “Only men over six feet,” even “will only respond to TALL men”. In fact, on OK Cupid’s blog, they used their data set to calculate the exact value of 1″ of height on a man. Every 1″ of height is equal to $30,000.00 in annual salary. In other words, all other things being equal, a man who is 5’9″ needs to make $140,000.00 to get an equal amount of response from comparably attractive women as a man who is 6′ tall making $50,000.00. And they break it down with hard data.

I am 5’9″ (and 3/8″ according to my annual physical) … on dating sites I just round up to 5’10″, though OK Cupid also did another study with their data set to prove that, on average, most men on dating sites lie about their height by an average of 2″. If I were 1/8″ taller I wouldn’t even technically be “lying,” I’d just be properly rounding. Should I lie by 2″ and say 5’11″ or even 6′ ??? Based on what OK Cupid reports, does this mean most women then assume all men are lying about their height and therefore assume you’re a little shorter, even than you say?

Anyway…

I have many lady friends, mostly from my youth that I’ve since reconnected with on Facebook. I grew up in a middle American city, and moved away to a very large urban center when I got married, to pursue my career.

We all know the oldest cliché: Height is a euphemism for the size of a guy’s cock, and when women say they only want to date tall men, what they’re really saying is that they really want to date a guy who is well hung. It’s about the oldest cliché in the world.

I’m 5’9″, but I’m hung like I’m 6’5″.

I know, it sounds like a good problem to have, but it’s not that easy.

As a younger man in a smaller town, I benefitted from gossip. I always dated very attractive girls when I was younger. My x-wife was and still is a very attractive woman.

One of the women I reconnected with on Facebook, whom I had relations with in high school, now lives in a small town in the midwest, married with several children, and raises horses. I had not seen this woman in over 20 years. She has photos of all her horses up on Facebook, and her stud horse is named after me !! Can I repeat, a woman whom I had not spoken a word to in over two decades named her stud horse my sir name (I have a unique family name, she has since conceded that I was indeed the inspiration … her husband does not know this).

I was not in terrible shape when I divorced a year ago, but since then I have lost weight, seriously hit the gym, and bought a whole new wardrobe.

Yet I cannot seem to get laid to save my life. Let me correct that, I cannot seem to get laid by the kind of women I could sleep with as a younger man, or women at the level of my expectation. I get many solicitations, both online and IRL by plain-janes, or chubby girls, etc. I get some attention, just not from the women I want.

During all my years in the big city, I had always been married, I now see that I have no x-girlfriends to spread the word. I have no “lady gossip” to drive my dating life. It doesn’t just feel like being single for the first time in 10 years, it feels like being a virgin all over again — in all the wrong ways.

I’m sure this is a very self-entitled attitude, but suddenly I’m left without my reputation to rely on, competing with all the small-pricked schmucks. When I meet a woman in a bar or social situation and attempt conversation, and in response I get ‘the treatment,’ I want to grab her by the shoulders and shout, “don’t you know who I am??!!” I’m also sure that sometimes my irritability comes across and does not help my cause.

Sharing my dating whoas with another Facebook lady-friend from my youth who has some first hand experience with my endowment, she has advised me that I need to “own your size.” How does one do that? Boast? Act “cocky”?

My problem is, I am a super nice guy. I am the epitome of the nice guy. And I always got away with this. I could be low-key. I could be friendly, and not act like a cocky loudmouthed prick, and still get plenty of attention from the girls, with the knowledge that many of them already knew a little secret (ok, a big secret) about me.

I’m also a smart guy, well read. I’m great with one-on-one conversation. I’m completely lousy at the “bar scene.” This worked well when I had my reputation to back it up. As a divorced “adult” and as an unknown in a big city with no girlfriends in town to “talk”, this instead seems to immediately put me into the “just friends,” column, if I even get that far.

In revamping my wardrobe, I bought a lot of expensive suites and nice clothes. I got a lot of first dates with admittedly hot girls … that were all gold diggers — they wanted to go out to the most expensive places in town, spend my money like crazy and send me home with a kiss on the cheek. Yet another lady friend from Facebook advised, “of course you’re attracting gold diggers, you’re going out to fancy bars wearing Armani suits — Who do you think you’re going to attract?” but after going on one (incredibly expensive) date with me, each of these women learned quickly that I’m not rich — a peck on the cheek and off they go. That strategy just left me frustrated and attracting the wrong women … and a lot lighter in the wallet. About two months ago I calculated that I spent $5000.00 on dates in one month, and didn’t get laid once. I was going on expensive dates with hot girls left and right … and got a lots of kisses on the cheek.

So I went back to the friend who advised that I needed to own my size, and tried to get more advice, I asked her how to do this. She said, “lay it on the table.” That doesn’t seem the right method to me. Just whip my big cock out of my pants on a first date??!! I believe that was once a Seinfeld episode. I’m not going to be that guy. So she then advised me to get an erection in my pants, and give my date a tight hug so she would “feel it against her.” Really? Pardon this sophomoric turn of phrase, but I don’t pop-a-boner on queue. So what am I to do, step out to the restaurant’s men’s room, beat-off, and then return to the table with my huge hard-on and give her a hug? So, I try my best here … at the close of one date, after a bit of flirtatious banter, I was somewhat aroused, “fluffed” as one might say, and when she went in for the goodbye kiss on the cheek, I gave her an intimate embrace, mostly pressing her against my lean abs, but her immediate reaction (rejection) was, “My gosh Chris, not here in public !!” And no second date.

So how does one “own your size,” if you have a big cock, but you’re not tall? I’ve started wearing stylish boots that have a bit of a heel. They do make me look taller.

I feel confident I must be at least 85% of most women’s dream guy: I’m a really nice guy, smart, well read, not rich but successful, I’m a very sharp dresser, subjectively I’m even told I’m handsome — I have a good mug, some receding hairline but most of my hair, and very physically fit, stomach flat as a board — AND I have a big cock. But I’m somewhat average in height, and I’m not naturally the most outgoing guy. After a few drinks, I’m a little more outgoing.

I don’t even want to run around chasing hot girls. I genuinely want a relationship. But I do have very high standards (extremely).

I think I just need to make 2012 the year of working on my career and make a lot more money. If I can get up to $190k, by OK Cupid’s algorithm I’ll be able to date the women that a guy who is 6′ making $100k can date — and I suspect that means, ‘any woman he wants’ (though not easy in one year, not inconceivable either … I’m currently making just under $100k but my personal best was about $185k. That was before the economy tanked and I was still married at the time). So $190k — That’s what I need in 2012. That’s ~$16k a month. So I will set a personal incentive: Hunker down, and no more dates until I have my first $16k+ month.

I’ve sat here typing for well over an hour. Thanks for letting me use your website to think this through.

I agree that online dating can be tough. I haven’t been successful in meeting women online or in person. But, I am working on being a leader and not just let things happen.

I like Marni’s idea of joining a new group. I’ve thought of a few I am going to try!

Sam

There is a lot more then this to getting women. this blog helped me with tips advice and links to a great site that gives u the in outs and lefts and rights when it comes to women check it out
http://womentroubletools.blogspot.com/