Well it’s a long story but if you are willing to hand out your opinion, would be great =)

It involves me, my friend Mary and a guy who was also my friend named Bob. Well we knew each other through high school. Me and Bob were more familiar with each other than either one of us with Mary. ANyways high school ended and before colelge began Bob offered me rides to college because i didnt have a ride. So i went with him to college and i used to be with him most of the time, we would jus chill in the college hall. As the first sem went on, half way into it, he started to meet Mary and since Mary was with him I would talk to her as well. Mary and Bob got closer with each other. I did too with Mary but not as much since I wouldnt be in the Hall all the times. Anyways it was fun, us 3 always foolin around (in a good way)..i would joke alot…

One day (still the 1st semester), Bob tells me that Mary likes me. I asked him how do you know? he says what if i can prove it.. i said just drop the subject….(i wasnt interested). Later i got a lil bit of a hint that either Bob and mary are really good friends of possiblity there might be more. So anyways one day Me and Bob after college went to some restaurant and were just talking and Mary’s name suddenly popped up. He told her shes cute n stuff. SO i told him yeah she is and she is nice got a good personality and i would go out with her also. He was like ok ill try for u…. i didnt say anything to him after that..then i went home and agreed to it…

What happens is the sem ends and behind my back (i dont remember if this was like a few days before me and Bob went to restaurant where Mary’s name came up or a few days after), Bob gives Mary a letter where it says “dont u want a gimme a chance, have some1 to share all ur secrets with, etc… and in the end he wrote swear on me that you wont tell J…” (she denied him but she did not tell me anything..me n her werent that close)

I did not know this at that time.. But anyways over the break Bob went out of country and then me and Mary got closer. (Bob didnt want me and mary to hang out..cuz he told me to wait until he gets back) but he knew we went together to the gym. Anyways Bob came back and said ok lets try for u.. but when he came back he started acting weird… so i got the idea (Bob made me feel) that Mary didnt want to talk to me. So i just let it be, i stopped trying to talk to her..tried to avoid her and everything. I was gettin a little pissed off at Bob as the sem started cuz i started to catch his lies n everything…
(at this point i was still goin to college with him but i finally got my license right when the sem was about to end)

anyways later near the end of that sem me and Mary talked to each other one day and we figured out everything Bob did so we decided not to talk to him… and instead me and Mary decided we will go to college together in summer. So we did, we got closer than ever.. she had never been this close to anyone and same went for me. We got very close and basically over the whole summer..I guess Bob was angry that i didnt take him to college (because he did a favor on me the whole year before). I was pretty sure he knew why, and i wanted him to talk to me about it but he didnt, inside tho it seemed to me he was only mad that Mary was talking to me and not him.. Anyways me n him didnt talk much over the summer. But he texted Mary sometimes and bothered her plenty saying “why are u not the same” “you have changed”..etc….

so she asked me if she should talk to him? i told her..go ahead..(who am i to stop that)…

summer came to an end but next sem started (3rd sem).. Bob was in one of my classes…we sat away from each other and didnt even say anything when we saw each other. The whole sem we didnt talk but things were okay between me n Mary except i stopped being “normal” with her even tho i still gave her rides… because i found out that she was with Bob and one of his friends in the library atleast 3-4 days outta the week. anyways she found out that Bob was using his friend (who was friends with Mary for a long time) to get everything out of Mary’s mind because she wouldnt tell Bob exactly why she wasnt normal with Bob.. She got angry when Bob told her thats what he did..so they didnt really talk much. In the same week (last day of sem) Bob gave me a message and said that “he had no regrets with me but only thing i did was that i didnt give him a ride and he was angry at that… but he regrets what he did” i didnt reply…i waited the whole break…

Over the break though, Mary and Bob got into arguemtn (online) and Bob made her pick saying “if you wanted to be with one of us Me or J, who would it be”?) she said she didnt think of us like that..so anyways…they stopped talking cuz he always bothered her in that sense…

break ended and i replied to Bobs message, saying that he regrets w/e’s done so iits good…

Anyways Me and Bob would only say hi when we saw each other.. and slowly talked a lil more (i was jus saying it for the heck of it…jus actin)… i told everything to marY… me n her got even closer and then Bob accidentally started talking to Mary and they decided they will talk a lil bit…

i couldnt bare it that Bob started acting weird whenever i came outta class and saw him and Mary talking for a lil bit..so I told Mary that hes acting weird…and i feel that hes doing something to try and mess up mine and her friendship… So finally i told her..ive been pissed lately and I TOLD HER my feelings… and she said she needed time to think…even tho i didnt ask her out (just wanted to inform her)… anyways later on for the first time me n her got into an argument because she started actin weird one day at the gym and Bob was there too..so i messed around with Bob (took his phone and called her when she went home because Bob did this to me in the very beginning of college*he always wanted to go thru my phone to see if i was talking to her or not*..i wanted to teach him a lesson)…

i felt weird the whole night.. called her up the next day and she told me what did u want to talk about..so we talked and got into a lil argument i told her i felt weird about all this..so i told her and then she told me she didnt have feelings for any1 but only that she was closer to me than him. she said dont wait for me but i told her if u do get them tell me?…we agreed. i told her i will try to get over it..

time went by and i saw her going to library with him again.. she was trying to hide it ….so i told her not to do that so she said she will tell me next time…

anyways it happened again and i just stopped calling her…and didnt even talk to her the whole next week (last week of 4th sem)… she called me asking if i was mad i said noo, just tired n all… she called me again after like 5 days and same question…same reply..and then a week later online…she asked me again.. i told her i was mad and she was “testing” me if i would act diff…(that was bs)

so she told me that o few days before she had gone to gym with BOb (she has no car) (and the day before Bob asked her that he would get her a hoodie from six flags but she said she would pay for it) but then after gym Bob told her to go to his car for the hoodie. so they went and he asked her a question “whats up with you and J” she said “idk he just stopped talking” and she started crying….she cried alot so he hugged her (she said it was jus a hug so she let him since she was crying) but then WHILE SHE WAS CRYING he tried to KISS her… so she said she backed up..and then went home even tho he wouldnt let her get out of car at first…

(all of us come from a conservative somewhat traditional culture..so its a not a small thing) i asked her to let me talk to him and she said noo..its ok..”shit happens, people just need a reason to act” (he had tried to touch/feel her hand before many times and

anyways she told me and i told her wow…and she promised me she wouldnt go to his car again.. but as summer classes came along…she told me she will come 2 days with me and the rest 2 days with Bob… i got pissed..i was somewhat mad but still normaly… then over the sem i saw them talking in library one day and she tried to HIDe it again…
so i told her to talk to me..after a few weeks she finally came out…(i didnt wanna talk to her while i was drivin..and only have like 10-15 mins)…

we talked i told her this is why i been mad .. that she had told me plenty of times that she wouldnt go abck into his car… she said yeah it was her fault… so still things werent normal cuz she didnt even call and only time i called was when i picked her up for college..so i called her out ONE MORE TIME….and one day she could finally come out but i couldnt go out so i told her cant…some other time we’ll talk… basically summer ended

all of us transfered to a diff school near by (we all transferred the to same one but its a big school)… she texted me a week before next *5th* sem started and i asked her that i can pick her up..she said she will let me know if she needs a ride…

then didnt talk till about a month into the sem and she texted so i told her “wanna talk?”..she said yeah..thas why i texted..then she thought that i didnt wanna talk but i told her i wanna talk…ur the one who doesnt come out.. lot of the sem went by…and she kept on procrastinating.. and i felt she didnt wanna talk and she felt the same way about me..but finally we met..we talked… i told her everything..and she said yeah its her fault..

what i told her was that how can she go back to talking to him..after what he did..she told me she had changed..i told her you told me that right before he tried it on you in the car…and she said yeah your right..

then she said things like shes trying to avoid him at school (but he gives her a ride to school most of the days?) she said that hes not over her…so she is literally trying to find a girl for him so he forgets her…

anyways supposedly things were back to normal..but didnt feel like how it was normal between us a while back… so the thing is that i know that Bob still talks to her.. and basically a friend of mine saw Bob and Mary in the mall a few days ago together… (just proves that basically shes not avoiding him)..

So idk what to do? we started talking a bit more just recently but any tips or ideas plz let me know…

btw we are all in our break now..and me and the other guy just dont even talk no more..cuz Bob jus stopped saying hi suddenly back in summer..).. anyways Mary just got herself a car just now!

Thing is what bothered me the most was all this drama stuff..it messed up my health before..im gettin back on track (got an injury lol..)… and the fact that she wasnt str8 forward with me….

what to do to change her mind about me? and how do i talk to her?

Is there any chance of us getting back to normal as how we were about a year ago?

And what to do about the other guy (i can just kick his ass…but it would just cause more drama for the girl and its not worth it to me that much..)?

Also, its possible the other guy and her may carpool with each other? should i do anything? if so, what?

I dont have those strong feelings for her right now but it can be because im not as close to her again..because i know when i start talking to her..they will get stronger..cuz sometimes i still wait for her to call me?

Thanks for reading my long story, if u want more details feel free to ask..its a very complicated story..! Please if you can help, would be great Thanks guys!

I have a few “friends” who need to be thrown up against something and kissed! And, ya know what ..? I’m going to do exactly that!! Let the consequences be damned! lol

ya’ll are great. I’ll let you know how it works out. But I already know. It’s gonna be GREAT.

FANTASTIC topic, and great info!

TA

Yeah Marni what’s up with that?! LoL Where is a picture of your crew? Zoe welcome!! Looking forward to your post and interacting and being a part of it. Thanks Marni you’re awesome too! You’ve gone so far w/ your blog and I love it!