When Is It Okay To Talk Dirty To A Woman?

When is it okay to talk dirty to a woman?

This is an area that has been fascinating me for the past week after getting an email from one of my clients, who I will refer to as D.

Email:

Marni,

Thanks for all your advice. I am having too much fun now.  I wish I truly understood this side of me in my teens and twenties.  Just knowing exactly what I want and what truly motivates me to pursue.

I am taking your advice on giving my dates a second chance. I didn’t know that you all (women) in general could be so wild. Now, I’m finding out even the shy/boring acting ones are too.  I told this one girl I was on a second date with  in so many words that her perfume smelled like an edible flower that I wanted to devour and from that point 80% of our conversation was sexual (mutually).

what is up with that?;)

D

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D has been experimenting with flirting, banter and escalating to sexual conversations with women. And I must say, he is doing very well.  What he is learning is that the less he constricts himself on what he CAN say, the more attracted,  excited and open women become.
Why? Because lack of rules mixed with, being attracted and feeling safe, cause a subtle rush of excitement.

I gave D my response but wanted to dive a little deeper with other women in my network. So I sent an email out to about 200 women to ask them their thoughts on when it is okay to talk dirty to a woman, do women like to talk dirty and what did they think of D’s actions?

I got some mixed responses, which I have posted below.  My commentary will be at the end:

J – (26). Truth. Once I have a few cocktails I am up for anything, especially if I am into the guy.  Drunk translates to feeling relaxed and comfortable.  Know what I mean?

A – (40) I’m sorry, this may not be very generous of me, but is this guy 15? He sounds totally ill-equipped to be dating grown women.

Ellen (59) – My response might be relative to how much i have had to drink. un-drunk, 2nd date, i find it creepy; unless that is what you want from the relationship, just sex.  In a relationship, when you feel safe, you can have dirty/sexy talk, why not?

S – (28) That’s a pretty good line. I think it gets a response because flowers conjure up feeling of beauty, delicate-ness, a delicious-ness that every woman wants to feel & have it related to her. Therefore it is not too threatening and very sensual. I would definitely respond to it – #1 – if I was wearing a floral scented perfume (which I usually don’t, so could be viewed as a total come on line) #2 – if I was feeling some chemistry from our 1st date, I’d be open to sexually tinged conversation on the 2nd…

C – (32) – Hmmmm….  For me, I found the email to be sweet.  It sounds to me like this man is exploring his natural impulses of sensuality.  Rather than staying all buttoned-up tight as lots of our societal conditioning can want us to be! Personally…  I’m a big fan of tapping into the more primal energies that I believe are always present…  But not always accessed in our everyday modern lives. I think I would have enjoyed his question as well…  IF…  And this is a big IF…  It came from a pure place of sensual pleasure.  If it came from a creepy place, then of course it would be a different story.  But I think I would have appreciated his creativity, and his risk to break outside of the dating mold. I like, what I call, a little grrrrrrrrr-rr-rr-r-rr in a conversation!

E – (30) He needs to be careful because there is a fine line between saying something to get a rise and sexual harassment. It may be rewarding if the girl is the same way.

JM – (29) If you are into him, it’s hot – not if he is a nerd. That would totally creep me out.

Marni’s Commentary:

Here are my thoughts on the topic.  I truly believe that deep down inside most women crave to be released sexually BUT they want to be released in a safe and secure environment.

Let me explain. Women are more locked sexually than men because of the backlash women constantly receive for being overtly sexual.  Names like whore and slut come to mind.  I think for a lot of women moving past the fear of being labeled is difficult to do. I know that when I was younger I never wanted to be placed in either of those categories. Therefore I held back sexually until I was sure that the man would not take advantage of me and respected me.  Sadly for me it locked me up sexually.

Fortunately I have a partner now who has been able to “unlock” me and help me really experience sex.

Now that I am more comfortable with my sexuality I would love if someone I LIKED talked to me the way D talked to his date. It’s fun, it’s exciting and it’s out of the norm.  I will say that even though I am not a big drinker, a little alcohol would help me drop my inhibitions and fears and I would gladly play along.

Just note that the creepy comment comes up several times in the responses above. There is a fine line between being sexually exciting and creepy.  Be careful not to cross that line. Baby steps, feel out the women you are with. She will tell you how far you can go and how comfortable she is with talking dirty.

TAKE AWAY: Women are open to being sexual, if anything they WANT to be sexual as long as they feel comfortable.

Want to hear more honest and real opinions straight from the mouths of women on sex, attraction, being approached, connecting, dating, relationships and tons more? Then Click Here.

What are your thoughts on this topic?

I would love to hear your experiences, opinions or any questions you have.

How To Kiss A Girl

NOTE: Be sure to check out What’s Inside A Woman’s Mind and get a real, unfiltered insiders look at how women REALLY behave when men aren’t around. Click Here to check out more

How To Kiss A Girl

The first kiss! Oh the first kiss!!!  Such an amazing moment sprinkled with discomfort, awkwardness and fear.  It’s never going to be as picture perfect as either of you imagine it but in this 5 minute audio I recorded, I tell you how to kiss a girl in a fun and creative way.

It’s called The Whiskey Kiss and it’s a way to take the edge off when you are freaking about when and how to kiss a girl.

Click Here to see Bill’s FREE Video on How To Kiss A Girl using the Whiskey Kiss.

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What To Say To A Naked Woman

I came across an amazing article while I was reading my man’s Men’s Health magazine. It was called What To Say To A Naked Woman.  The article is based on a survey conducted by the magazine where they surveyed over 2,000 women on a myriad of questions.

I wanted to highlight some interesting points that were shared in this article.

What To Say To A Naked Woman

1. Most women have insecurities (duh) and love frequent, enthusiastic compliments

2. Love and Care is one of the 19 recognized mate-retention tactics. Aaron Goetz Ph. D says “The biggest part of the love and care tactic is complimenting your partner’s physical appearance.”

3. Evolutionary psychologists show that women are programmed to be skeptical of what men say. It’s their way of protecting themselves from manipulative men who don’t want to commit to relationships. TIP Avoid exaggerating. The more a compliment is tailored to that specific woman, the more intimate and effective it is says Tammy Nelson Ph.D.

4. Women said they enjoyed compliments about their breasts. EXAMPLES Your breasts are so soft. They fit your body perfectly.  Your nipples are so hot.

5. For women, compliments lose their credibility when they’re paid in response to a statement of insecurity

6. Note changes to her appearance. Her efforts are a common mate-retention tactic.

7. Women are most sensitive about their stomachs

8. Women are more aware then men are of compliments given and received, according to a 2004 study. Women see compliments as a way to grow closer to a partner. Keep giving her compliments whether she is in the buff or fully clothed. It reassures her that you still feel an emotional connections to her.

9. Compliments from others are often more believeable than compliments from you. Tell her compliments your guy friends have given her about her.

10. Make sure she knows how happy or excited you are to be in bed with her. Display feelings.

11. Out of 572 women, the majority of them listed Panties, Camisole or a Necklace are the single items she feels sexiest to leave on when stripping down

Remember that each of these were in response to the title topics “What To Say To A Naked Woman”.  Each of the items listed below will help your lady feel more comfortable, more secure and safe.  Remember the safer she feels the more she will do

Another important thing to note is that women enjoy being sexual.  They just want to be able to choose their sexuality rather than have it forced on them.  As stated above, the more you can make a women feel accepted, attractive and safe during any sexual act, the more free she will be.  When you provide a safe space it allows a woman’s mind to free itself of insecurities and actually enjoy being in the moment.

Do you want more information on how to free a woman’s mind so that she can unleash her sexual side in a safe environment?  Or learn, step-by-step, how to attract, meet, date and SEDUCE every woman you select?

Then get my top rated, instantly downloadable program, What’s Inside A Woman’s Mind.

Click Here to find out more

I will be increasing prices in the next few days and don’t want you to miss out on this mind blowing, insider’s information that I will be revealing at a hugely discounted price!

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For those of you who have purchased What’s Inside A Woman’s Mind your FREE updates are available now. If you don’t have the program yet, YOU SHOULD .  Click Here to find more.

One Night Stand: Women Tell All

(**To listen to me and my friend Amy discuss when women want a One Night Stand go to the bottom of this entry!)

A few weeks back I posted a blog about when women want a One Night Stand. I got a ton of emails both from my newsletter members and from blog readers like you- wanting to know more!

I didn’t realize this was such a hot topic!

As always, I dug deep and asked every single one of the women in my network about their thoughts on a One Night Stand. Girlfriends, sisters, mother, Wing Girls, on facebook, through twitter… Every female I could find and I pretty much got the same responses from all.

Out of all the women, maybe 2 had never had a one night stand BUT said they had considered it and attempted it a few times.

From the other women, each of them used the words “I decided…” when describing their one night stands. I thought this was really interesting. I mean I must have talked to at least 200 women about this and each said something along the lines of I decided.

This was interesting to me, cause what I think I discovered from my questioning was that most one night stands for women are PRE MEDITATED!!! Or at least women like to think so.

The one time I had a one night stand, it was pre meditated. I was coming off a broken heart, insecure and wanted to just DO IT cause I thought it would shake my sad feelings. Never a good idea.

I have however had multiple one night fool arounds and loved every second of it!

Why? Because it was fun, exciting, went with the night and felt really, really good!!!!

These were guys I met while I was out and there was an instant, fun and exciting connection. They weren’t guys who asked me about my job or my family during our meeting. They were guys who were light, bantery and just plain old fun! Ones who pulled me into a world of excitment and enjoyment. It almost seemed fitting to make out with them and be part of a fantasy world.

Sometimes, that is all women are looking for! A great guy to blow off steam with!

I wanted to dive deeper into this discussion of a One Night Stand so I asked my friend Amy if she would be open to a recorded discussion and she said YES!!!!

Here is just 2 minutes of our 20 minute discussion on our experiences with a one night stand, why we had a one night stand and what makes us want to have a one night stand!

Click Here To Listen To The Full 20 Minutes of our discussion of A One Night Stand!

Full version includes 2 FREE days of Virtual Wing Girl Subscription!

How To Please A Woman Sexually

You want to know how to please a woman sexually?  It’s not always what you think.

In this special interview, I sit down with my friend Jason Lane (an expert on sexual escalation) to discuss attraction, how to get physical, and what men can do to really please a woman in bed.

Want to get access to more techniques and learn how to satisfy a woman? Click Here

Warning: Adult pictures are found at this web link. If you’re easily offended or can’t stand to look at sexy women – then this site isn’t for you. But if you’re mature, open, and proud of your sexuality, you don’t want to miss this: Click Here

6 Signs That A Woman Is A Cock Tease

A Wing Girls job is to let a man know what he needs to do in order to attract the women he wants. It is also her job to inform him of when he is wasting his time on a woman that is not into him.

Therefore I am going to teach you 6 Signs A Woman Is A Cock Tease.

A Cock Tease is a woman who, from the male perspective, acts in a sexual manner that seems to have the intention of seducing a man, but without actually fulfilling the expected sexual actions.

Pay close attention to these instructions. I promise, if you learn these signs it will save you time, energy, heartache and $$$’s.

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Why Do Women Flirt With No Intention Of Being With You, A.K.A Cock Tease?

This has been an annoying thing for men for some time and here is the brutal gist of it fellas… The same reason you men take time to play video games, watch sports, and all things of that nature is the exact same reason us women “Flirt With No Intentions Of Being With You. It’s FUN!!!

OK, OK, it’s not very nice of us ladies, and is a tad egotistical, we admit that, but it’s the facts. Being that I am a faithful flirt
I am guilty of this unconscious pleasure of “flirting for fun”, it’s one of those deeds women do on a whim and seemingly enjoy in the moment and then once over feel slightly guilty and ask ourselves “why did I just flirt with him when I have no intentions of being with him?”. Go figure.

Every man on the planet wants an answer of how to prevent encountering this scenario, but it’s not as cut and dry as you think. The way it works is 95% of women are natural flirts it’s innate and the reason you may have received flirting that resulted in no action is because us women flirt for attention; we flirt to boost our own confidence and ego’s, we flirt to simply feel cute and attractive, the main objective of a woman’s being is feeling wanted, even if we don’t want you unfortunately.

Flirting for us simply gains wanted attention and assurance that we could in fact have you if we wanted. Most of the time previous to flirting we know that we don’t, but still flirt for mere fun as well as confidence boost, come on’ fellas, no woman passes up a chance to look endearing, feel like an innocent girl, and bat our mascara enhanced eyelashes.

No man wants to play the fool so to help detect when you are interacting with a Cock Tease I’ve listed some tactics to help you have the advantage of scoping out a guilty flirt with no intentions of being with you:

TOP 6 SIGNS THAT A WOMAN IS A COCK TEASE:

1. She doesn’t talk about her personal statures-   she’s being vague for a reason.

2. She never makes direct comments on how cute/ attractive you are-   she’s not sincerely attracted, she’s entertaining herself.

3. She keeps conversation constricted to things going on in the moment-    not interested in sharing any moments beyond this point.

4. She lets a gal pal pull her away-   give it up, this was a mere flirtatious encounter.

5. She takes your number instead of giving you hers – She’s doesn’t want you calling her, and has no intentions on calling you.

6. She is not open to being touched- She pulls away when you make attempts at physical contact

This can be a hard thing to swallow about us ladies, so on a brighter note I wanted to share that I have indeed experienced a few rare occasions where I have flirted with a guy with no intentions of being with him and was pleasantly surprised with interest… so keep hope alive fellas! There are always special odds to every scenario.

BUT for the most typical occasions remember these signs the next time a woman flirts with you, to weed out the fake flirts… it will save your time for the legitimate ones.

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7 Ways To Create Sexual Chemistry With Women

A lot of men are constantly asking me “How do can I escalate from friends to sexual attraction?”. Escalating is easier than one might think because all it involves is believing that you are sexual and stating your intentions. The difficult part is actually believing you are sexual and having the confidence and comfort in yourself to actually display your intentions.

Quick lesson: If you want to be seen as a sexual option stop presenting yourself as a friend or a suck.  Be straight, direct and confident in the way you present yourself.

I have written you a piece that will help you show a woman you want her sexually without being aggressive or an a**hole.

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Article

What can be said about sexual chemistry between men and women?  Is it just a myth or is it a magic bullet aimed straight at the heart (or elsewhere…)?  Some couples say when they met they had “instant chemistry.”  So what exactly does this mean?  Is sexual chemistry a simple biological process or something more complex, a layering of mental and physical attraction, body language, and ancient love juju?

Ancient love juju aside, sexual chemistry is actually based on a kind of unconscious perception and interpretation of someone’s appearance and behavior.  Huh?  Simply put, we are constantly scanning the opposite sex for signs of interest and compatibility.  When we project the right signals, we are able to attract the objects of our desire.

For example, if a man projects a vibe of independence, seems to be happy, and appears to know what he wants, this triggers arousal in women.  “At first sight” he is providing enough evidence for a woman’s desire to be stoked.  Suddenly she sees him in a more sexual way, based entirely on her perception of him as strong and independent.  It also doesn’t hurt that when a guy appears sexually exuberant, he gives a woman the impression she’ll have a satisfying experience with him.

Men so often suppress their sexual strength and assertiveness as a result of past rejection; they get caught up in their own fears, trying to second-guess what women want.  These guys appear weak and inhibited, and, on an unconscious level, women see them as being “too feminine.”  Who wants to share in a guy’s weakness or have to fix it?  Either way, the sexual chemistry is ruined.

So, how can a guy amp up his ability to create hot sexual chemistry with a woman without having it blow up in his face like a bad science project?

1. Be aware of the kind of vibe you are projecting.  Are you coming off as confident, carefree, and fun or an emotional drag?
2. Pay attention to the subtle signals she’s sending you. Is she leaning into you and smiling or sitting back with her arms crossed over her chest?  It takes two to make chemistry happen, so be responsive to her vibe.  A little attentiveness can go a long way.
3. Don’t second-guess yourself.  Retreating inside your brain to battle your insecurities takes you out of the moment and is a sure way to kill chemistry.
4. Be direct and confident.  Looking into her eyes and smiling while you talk will make you appear assertive, enthusiastic, and sexy.
5. Don’t fear rejection.  Relax!  Remember we are constantly projecting signals.  If she picks up on how tense you are, she’s likely to tense up, too.
6. Make her laugh.  Light sexual innuendo is a great way to lighten the mood and convey your attraction.
7. Don’t be afraid to let her know you’re interested.  Women can sense it, anyway.  It’s chemistry, stupid!

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The important notes to take away this article is to be proud and confident in what you want. If you want to sleep with a woman don’t try to hide it, show it. Not in a sleezy, gropey way but in a sexually strong way.  The way that gets women turned on in 2 seconds by presenting them with a man that knows what he wants and can lead. How sexy is that??!!!

Answer: SO SEXY. Trust me.

Be sure to share this article on all your social media sites!

This is an important message to share with all men.

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Where To Take A Girl On A Date: First Date Ideas

Tons of men ask me “Where should I take a girl on a date?”

My answer to them is always the same “Where do you want to go on a date?”

The dating process is all about seeing if two people can connect and fit into each others lives.  Therefore I feel that in the beginning stages of dating you must hold true to who you are so the other person can see if they want to come along for the ride.

A lot of men try too hard to think “what would impress her?”, “what would she want to do?”, “what will make her want to be with me more?”

In the beginning, the first few dates, this she or her is really no one to you.  At least not anyone whose needs come before yours.  Right?

So then stop focusing on her and start focusing on you.

If you want to go to a salsa class, take her with.  If you want to go to a comedy show and laugh, take her with.

A first date does not need to be extravagant, expensive and showy. It has to be real and it has to be you.

BUT most importantly it has to be fun and enjoyable.

Great first date ideas:

1. Drinks at a bar
2. Bowling
3. Walk on the boardwalk, walk street
4. Jazz club
5. Salsa dancing
6. Comedy show
7. Concert
8. Mini Golf
9. Billiards
10. Go carting
11. Art exhibit
12. Wine bar
13. Cooking class
14. Book signing

My recommendation is to not go to an expensive restaurant and wine and dine.

NOT YET!

Wait until you know she is worth it.

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Do Women Want Sex As Much As Men?

Of course we do. We just want to be able to make the choice to have sex.

Speaking for myself, as a woman, I like sex. It’s fun and it feels good. What’s not to like.

I will be honest and tell you that I am a good girl who used to be very prude when I was younger.

The reason i was so prude was that I was uncomfortable. Uncomfortable with boys, my body and myself.

Not a good combo if I ever wanted to have a mind blowing sex life.

When I was 18 I went backpacking and safely kissed my way up the east coast until I met a very special guy who totally broke me out of my shell.

The first time we were making out he said to me “I want you to be comfortable. If I do anything that makes you nervous or uncomfortable, just slap my hand and I will stop.”

I can tell you there was no hand slapping and I got very comfortable.

The reason for this was because I felt that I was in charge of my sexuality. I was getting to make the choice and that alone put me at ease.

Women want to be sexual. Women want to be sexy and women want to live out crazy sexual fantasies but they need to feel safe and secure.

They want to know that they are the ones making the choice and not being forced or pushed into being sexual.

I never want to feel judged or pressured. I don’t want to be tossed in the slut category and therefore I am very conscious of who I give my sexuality to.

Women want to be unlocked. Trust me. Even the purest of pure want an adventure.

As men, you can give women a safe place to be sexual. Just like my backpacking friend did for me.

Next time you are getting intimate with a woman, try his move and I promise you will get great results.

Give A Woman A Kiss To Remember

Give a woman a kiss to remember and I can guarantee you she will keep coming back for more.

I just stumbled upon this great article about kissing on iVillage. Simply reading it got me excited so imagine if the kiss described actually happened.

Check out the article: http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sexkissing/0,,askmen_dqdtxf5l,00.html?dst=rss|ls