Marni's Wing Girl Method > Blog > How To Approach Women > How To Be Cool With Women

How To Be Cool With Women

 May 21, 2012

This email that I just received today, could not have come at a better time. It’s a perfect example of re-framing a situation so that you can be cool with women. 

 

Eddie is one of my long time members and has been using my materials to learn how to be cool with women.  I think it’s working :-)

  • Parkey

    Become detached from a particular outcome, though be true to your desires.

    This liberates you to enjoy the moment.

    • Marni Wing Girl

      Love this comment!

  • skw

    In a way, you’re right parkey, but “becoming detached” isn’t the whole story. Just saying “become detached” is not very effective,… why? because deep down you really ARE attached, but telling yourself to become detached.. the most you can hope for is a superfluous state of temporary “I don’t care what happens”

    Being cool is a MIX of two feelings as I see it:

    -Thinking you *actually* have a chance at success, and those thoughts have to be ROOTED in some kind of foundation.

    -Not placing an IN-ORDINATE amount of pressure on one situation, knowing that you’ll have *chances* in the future.. note, not successes, but *chances*

    I also add that there’s a necessity to have some kind of “fatalistic” belief as well, in the sense, a belief that because you weren’t hit by a bus yet, there must be some reason for you to be on the planet still.

    I think this is a far more accurate and nuanced view of “being cool with women” not just “detach yourself from the outcome”

  • skw

    I read a lot of tips for sales people and actors, in a sense each date is an audition and a sales pitch (at least from a mans POV)

    Not thinking about the outcome assumes one thing: you enjoy the process.

    Thats what they tell actors: don’t go in expecting to impress the director or casting agent, go in and relax and have fun with the scene. in other words, go back to why you wanted to act in the first place: to assume roles and tell stories.. not to get jobs, not to worry, “is this believable???”

    Every date I go on, I tell myself right before: “F$@(#$ this B@*$ I’m here to just enjoy myself, not to impress her”