How To Break Up With Your Girlfriend Like A MAN

From:

August 17, 2012

Lately, the top topic of discussion amongst my Wing Girls is why can’t guys just act like a man when they are breaking up with a woman. In fact, one of my Wing Girls just went through a recent break up with a guy she was dating for almost a year.

This guy did the awful and sadly typical move of “I’m going to get distant and act strange so she’ll get upset and have to break up with me”. (BTW, girls do this move as well so this is not a stab at men).

As you can guess, or probably know from experience, this kind of technique can be very hurtful, freakin frustrating and down right confusing. My Wing Girl has been crushed by the situation. Not because she and her boyfriend broke up. But because, someone that she dedicated so much of her time to, could not respect her enough to simply be honest with her.

I know you have been told time and time again, women LOVE jerks, but this is not the “jerky” behavior they are referring to.

Cause you know what happens when you cowardly break up with a woman this way?

1. You get bad dating Karma?

2. You ruin your good female PR. You make an enemy out of an ex, who could have been your biggest cheerleader and tell other girls about you.

3. You make it harder for your ex to trust another man. A man who may have been the right guy for her.

4. Your penis may literally shrink!!! There is no telling what a scorned woman is capable of. Ever heard of a woman named Lorena Bobbit?

Check out this video I made for you that includes The Wing Girl Method’s guidelines for How To Break Up With Your Girlfriend Like A MAN

Even if you aren’t in a relationship now and planning on breaking up, remember these guidelines for breaking up to ensure you always leave a woman, better than you found her.

Always, break up with your girlfriend like a MAN, instead like a coward.

For more tips on how to be THE MAN Women Want. A man of great integrity, go here.

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skw

Marni, I wonder when you reach the pearly gates will you start telling God, “Listen God you can’t just be wishy washy you have to run heaven like a MAN”

“Always, break up with your girlfriend like a MAN, instead like a coward.”

How about women? can they break up like cowards? because they do all the time. My ex wouldn’t even meet me to give me stuff she borrowed from me, she had some friend of hers send it. How cowardly is that?

“4. Your penis may literally shrink!!! There is no telling what a scorned woman is capable of. Ever heard of a woman named Lorena Bobbit? ”

This is outrageous, now we have to follow your advice or else a woman will be justified in cutting our DICKS off ? This is the converse of the “blame the victim” syndrome. How would you like it if I said women should take care of how they dress, or else they risk getting raped. “Ever heard of a woman running alone in central park at night” ?

Now JW Bobbit was *responsible* for the COWARDLY act of his wife ?
skw

by the way.. women have done every one of the things you say that men shouldn’t do

I disagree, you can have sex with your ex, if it’s clear that it’s only sex. A woman has to be mature enough to understand that.
David L.

Skw, this blog that Marni made was made towards MEN breaking up with women. Not the other way around I’m sure Marni would acknowledge the fact that women has also made these mistakes as well and encourage that they should also listen to her advice. Also, when Marni made the point about our penises shrinking and mentioning the Lorena Bobbit situation, I’m sure that is was just used as an EXAMPLE of what women are capable of if we don’t man up in these types of situations. She never blatantly said to follow her advice or else your penis will be cut off! And as far as having sex with an ex is concerned, I agree with Marni. What’s the point of going back to an ex just to have sex? There are plenty of women out there that can give you that and more if you represent what a real man looks like. Besides, there is too much of risk of putting an idea into an ex’s head that there still may be some hope of another relationship happening. If you have no intentions of having a relationship, you’re manipulating the other person. It doesn’t matter what you say. Actions speak louder than words. You’ve got to be considerate of what the other person is thinking and feeling. And to you Marni, great post. Keep it up!
- skw
  
  “Skw, this blog that Marni made was made towards MEN breaking up with women. ”
  
  but by phrasing it as “break up like a man” it implies that because we are men we are *supposed* to act a certain way (ie with courage) where as women are not required to do so. She could have said, “break up like an adult” or “break up responsibly’ or “break up respectfully” but “break up like a man” means you are a man and therefore you have to act with courage, where as we women don’t. It’s this kind of unequal treatment that I dislike, women live in a world of complete impunity and can go on talking about how society does this and that to them. How would she feel if I said, “learn how to break up like a WOMAN” and then proceeded to dictate she should do this and that.
  
  “Also, when Marni made the point about our penises shrinking and mentioning the Lorena Bobbit situation, I’m sure that is was just used as an EXAMPLE of what women are capable of if we don’t man up in these types of situations.”
  
  Ok, thanks for proving my point “man up” why does “man up” mean act courageously? Women are not required to show courage? they can just sit back and be cowards?
  
  Bobbit could have been the most “cowardly” person in the world, it still doesn’t warrant having his f*cking dick cut off. Hello? do you see how warped this is?
  
  It’s just like saying to a woman, “dont run in central park at night wearing short shorts and a tight shirt with your tits bouncing all over the place – you will likely get raped” and the woman says, “ugh blame the victim how dare you bla bla bla”
  
  “What’s the point of going back to an ex just to have sex?”
  
  Im not saying one should do that, just that one CAN do it, if the terms are laid out properly.
  
  “And to you Marni, great post. Keep it up!”
  
  It’s a good post, although completely imbalanced. this advice is good for people to treat each other respectfully.
  
  And Marni should learn to re write her posts to not be so accusatory, if she’s actually interested in helping people rather than just landing the next penthouse interview or VH1 show or whatever.
  - DingChavez
    
    Skw
    I agree.
    Since women can’t be upfront about ANYTHING, I have little sympathy for how a man breaks up with a woman.
    Women. Start telling men exactly what you mean.
    STOP giving hints.
    You set up the relationship game so everything on your end is covert and confusing and we have to be upfront with everything.
    Doesn’t make sense.
    - skw
      
      you know who I feel like right now? This lady:
      
      http://youtu.be/OYecfV3ubP8
      - Parkey
        
        Learn to see the emperor’s clothes.
        
        Maybe bitterness about how you think women have wronged you gives you some small pleasure in the short term, but it either that nor dictating how you think women should be will get you where you want to go.
      - skw
        
        That makes no sense at all. Parkey, are you just maybe bitter that more and more people are coming out of the woodwork agreeing with my (extremely valid) points ?
        IF your entire reasoning is “yes you make sense, but it doesn’t help you because women do not, learn to not make sense” then its a well-taken point, although very difficult for a man of logic like myself to execute on.
      - Parkey
        
        And you think someone is going to say “Bravo! Well argued. You’ve proven that you have been hard done by and so you deserve compensation. Here, have a girlfriend.”?
        
        I’m an annoyingly logical person, as evidenced by the last MBTI test I took. I’m not a martyr to logic though and I recognise that logic always stands on the shaky foundations of subjective assumptions. Given the choice between proving to myself that I’m factually correct or being wrong but having female companionship and sex I know which I am enjoying right now.
        
        Just sayin’. Been where you are. It feels satisfying maybe but it’s also a complete dead end.
      - skw
        
        “And you think someone is going to say “Bravo! Well argued. You’ve proven that you have been hard done by and so you deserve compensation. Here, have a girlfriend.”?”
        
        I don’t care what anyone says. I always thought the key to winning women was being authentic and direct. I’d quote where Marni says this, but Ive done it ad nauseum.
        
        “I’m an annoyingly logical person,”
        
        Thats the most illogical statement I’ve ever heard. Admit what you are, I dont’ care what any test says, you continuously defy any kind of logical framework in your discussions, any modicum of respect I had for you rested on your admission of what you are, now you’re dashing even that.
        
        “Given the choice between proving to myself that I’m factually correct or being wrong but having female companionship and sex I know which I am enjoying right now.”
        
        So, say what women want to hear even though it internally conflicts with what you are? gotcha.
        
        “Been where you are. ”
        
        No, you clearly haven’t. If you’re able to discard your “logical” thinking ability with such ease, you clearly haven’t.
      - Parkey
        
        From where I’m sitting you never come across as a Spock. There’s a ton of emotial baggage hanging off everything you say. You’re human.
        
        It’s not about logic is it. It’s about fear.
        
        I do what works. It means changing your outlook, using mental muscles you have neglected in the past, and that can be scary, but the good news is that afterward you get to have sex, and more.
      - skw
        
        “From where I’m sitting you never come across as a Spock. There’s a ton of emotial baggage hanging off everything you say. You’re human.”
        
        Examples please? from where you’re sitting there must be lots of ferengi or romulans or that gas that killed spock in wrath of khan.
        
        “I do what works. It means changing your outlook,”
        
        I dont know what this means. Im not in the habit of believing things that aren’t true. like I said, if you’re able to do that with ease, then bravo to you.
      - Parkey
        
        Some things are only true because you believe them. Believing is a skill that anyone can learn.
      - skw
        
        Write me a check for your entire life savings and send it over tonight.
        
        It’ll be the smartest thing you ever do, your entire life.
        
        You’ll be benefited in the long run, believe it because I say its true, never mind what your mind is telling you.
        
        Just believe it, and it’ll be true. It’s a skill that you can learn.
        
        —See how absurd that sounds?
      - skw
        
        It’s been 13 mins. I’m still waiting on that check. What? You don’t believe it’ll help you? Well stop thinking, and just believe it. it’ll be true.
      - skw
        
        Still waiting for that check. Hmm I guess you decided to think and use logic to make a decision about a belief. Who’da thunk?
      - Parkey
        
        The empirical evidence that this will benefit me is what exactly?
        
        If you’re intent on being too clever to listen don’t expect anybody to wish you well.
      - skw
        
        “The empirical evidence that this will benefit me is what exactly?”
        
        whoa whoa whoa? who said you can ask for evidence? empirical or otherwise?
        
        Believe in the emperor’s clothes. Just believe it because I say so. I still haven’t gotten the check yet, it must be in transit. In fact, your request for evidence must’ve been some hooligan hacking into your account, because asking for evidence to support a belief is clearly something you don’t advocate:
        
        “Learn to see the emperor’s clothes.”
        
        “If you’re intent on being too clever to listen don’t expect anybody to wish you well.”
        
        I’m intent on showing you the utter absurdity of what you say, and sometimes that’s only possible when you make that person experience what it is you’re experiencing. What you’re telling me sounds *just* as absurd as what Im telling you.
      - Parkey
        
        Yeah, absurd. There must be another reason why women never used to sleep with me and now they do.
        
        You will experience what you believe. Currently you believe bad and bad is what you get. Believe good, though it may seem silly, and you will get good. If you want to believe bad and hope to recieve good in order to persuade you to change your mind that’s like standing cold in front of a fireplace saying “first you give me some heat, then I’ll throw on some fuel”.
        
        Just saying what works. Use it or stay cold.
      - skw
        
        “There must be another reason why women never used to sleep with me and now they do.”
        
        I need more empirical evidence. as in evidence that proves you were in as low and deprecated a state as mine (and it needs to be more convincing than you saying “I was there too man”) If you’re not willing to break down the mechanics and explain *why* your course of action worked (which you’re clearly not, because you continuously ask me to believe blindly) then you should at least be willing to elucidate the *extent* of which it worked.
        
        “You will experience what you believe. Currently you believe bad and bad is what you get. Believe good, though it may seem silly, and you will get good. ”
        
        You will experience what you believe, current you believe giving me all your money will make you in a less advantageous state. Believe that it will actually make you feel better, though it may seem silly, and it will actually make you feel great for the rest of your life! Just believe it!
        
        Just saying Im still waiting for the check, which Im sure is on its way, because you can believe things without evidence so effortlessly right?
      - Parkey
        
        For me the first substantial piece of empirical evidence was cute, blonde and petite with hazel eyes. The morning after, as we cuddled together on my couch she told me that it had been two years since she had been able to have sex with a guy. There were plenty of guys in her life; older, better off, better looking. In fact as we were there her phone kept buzzing with text messages from guys, to the point where just turned it off. She said that she chose me because she felt my happiness was not in any way tied to her actions. There was no pressure on her.
        
        I’m telling you what works. Bring an oversupply of happiness to the party regardless of circumstance and share it with the people around you. Looking to women’s actions to validate your self worth is hideously ugly and repels them.
        
        This why you can’t look for evidence of your own worth, because you will always be looking for it regardless, and what’s more she can sense that. You have to know your own greatness without evidence.
        
        It took me so many years of deep loneliness and frustration but thanks to people like Marni and others I figured it out. When you’re getting text messages from women asking if you’re free on Friday night and want some company you start to wonder what all the fuss was about.
      - skw
        
        “For me the first substantial piece of empirical evidence”
        
        This doesn’t answer my question. The evidence I requested
        
        “I’m telling you what works.”
        
        Im sure it does work, for those who don’t have an oversupply of unhappiness and negative experience, its easy to bring and oversupply of happiness. And Im glad you’re in that position. but not everyone is able to do that so effortlessly.
        
        “It took me so many years of deep loneliness and frustration but thanks to people like Marni and others I figured it out.”
        
        Marni is virtually useless to someone that has really suffered the continuous sting of rejection. This doesn’t mean she’s a bad person, she just has no clue what its like to be in such a position, furthermore her writing style is way too accusatory and commanding “do this like A MAN!” all it does is just drive the knife deeper. If she wants to be someone that actually helps people, she should look into altering that strategy. If she wants to be someone that does videos for AskMen , then she should continue her current course of action.
        
        Obviously your loneliness and frustration is superficial compared to mine. Because Ive continuously asked you to tell me where you generate this “happiness” from if not from external events. and you have no answer.
        
        What good is an “oversupply of happiness” if it’s feigned and inauthentic?
      - skw
        
        “What good is an “oversupply of happiness” if it’s feigned and inauthentic?”
        
        I thought we had to be direct in 2012 to get women. according to Marni:
        
        http://www.winggirlmethod.com/5-things-you-need-to-do-to-get-women-in-2012/
        
        “There is nothing sexier than a man who can be direct. Be direct and ask for what you want”
        
        I’m being completely direct, I’ve been rejected by most women I’ve approached, and having sex with a woman will make me feel better about my abilities to attract women. So in that case, a part of my self-worth (as it relates to women) is completely dependent on external success with women.
      - Parkey
        
        For happiness you just have to put on the rose tinted spectacles and be grateful for all of the wonderful things you have. You can also give selflessly to others, including women.
        
        And purge any and all “poor me” from your speech, your writing and your thinking. Catch yourself doing it, stop it instantly.
        
        Not easy, but it works.
      - skw
        
        theres a difference between rose-tinted spectacles glasses that are an opaque color making you not see reality. it’s called blinders.
        
        “And purge any and all “poor me” from your speech, your writing and your thinking. Catch yourself doing it, stop it instantly.”
        This is my point, if you’re able to do it so effortlessly, maybe you have less reason to have “poor me” type speech and thinking in the first place.
        
        “be grateful for all of the wonderful things you have.”
        
        oh, I totally am. I’m just not attractive to women.
      - skw
        
        I’ve heard this before, but what do I do when a girl rejects me, remind myself how I’m not a rwandan refugee with his hands cut off? believe me, I’m grateful for not being that. But how does that make me more attractive to women? Most of them can’t even find Canada on a map, let alone Rwanda.
      - skw
        
        I’ve heard this before, but what do I do when a girl rejects me, remind myself how I’m not a rwandan refugee with his hands cut off? believe me, I’m grateful for not being that. But how does that make me more attractive to women? Most of them can’t even find Canada on a map, let alone Rwanda.
      - Parkey
        
        Feel good, meet women, indiscriminately make them feel good, have fun. If you’re doing this, aren’t trying to trade for affection, aren’t trying to lock them down into something, they will start giving you all the opportunities you could want.
        
        Talk of “rejection” is just self abuse. Not every woman out there is going to feel the magnetic pull. So what? If you’re having fun it shouldn’t matter. If you’re having fun the next one usually comes out of nowhere.
      - DingChavez
        
        I don’t know where you live, but where I live, the next one NEVER comes out of nowhere.
      - Parkey
        
        I live on a different planet to the one I was on just a year ago. It’s awesome!
      - Ding Chavez
        
        If you would be so kind, please send the rocketship back for me.
        I’m on the run from the Klingons, Romulans, and Darth Vader.
      - Parkey
        
        You have to build your own rocketship, metaphorically speaking. That’s how it works. All that people like Marni can do is give you the blueprints. All I can do is tell you that yes it flies, when you’ve built it.
        
        If you would prefer to sit on the ground whinging about how the law of gravity isn’t how it ought to be and getting bitter about it… Well, get used to living on the planet you’re on now.
      - skw
        
        look, until you provide some kind of data or proof backing up your assertions, you’ll still be at an impasse.
        
        “If you would prefer to sit on the ground whinging about how the law of gravity isn’t how it ought to be and getting bitter about it… Well, get used to living on the planet you’re on now.”
        
        Think of a problem you have right now. Any problem. (Im sure even someone like you still has at least one)
        
        I’ll give you the solution to solve it: Send me all your money
        
        What? You don’t believe that will solve your problem? Well, who said you could use your brain and analyze *why* and *how* my suggestion would solve your problem. It just will. You think it won’t? Well, I say it will, and you just have to believe me. You can either just sit there talking about how it wont solve it, or send me the money and find out.
      - skw
        
        It’s been an hour or so since i’ve asked for the money, I haven’t gotten it yet. But it can’t be that you’re using your brain to analyze the problem you have and using what you know about the problem to weed out possible solutions.
        
        No, you’d never do that.
      - skw
        
        actually, give DIng Chavez 10% and me 90%. That’ll solve all your problems. Why? because I just decided it to be true and if you don’t believe it, then you’ll just be wallowing in your own problem.
        
        The choice is yours.
      - skw
        
        still, waiting for that check by the way. I guess for some strange reason you’re actually using your brain to analyze and determine that sending me your money may not directly help you with your problem? Hmm fancy that. Parkey uses logic ?
      - skw
        
        You keep saying this but provide no data.
        
        “You don’t want to give and certainly not for the joy of giving, you only want to receive.”
        
        Wait.. and women don’t? Why is it that men have to be so noble and only give without anything in return but women can just sit there and receive? Is that a rule of law? that women just sit back and get shit? Seems like a pretty good deal to me.
      - Ding Chavez
        
        “Wait.. and women don’t? Why is it that men have to be so noble and only give without anything in return but women can just sit there and receive? Is that a rule of law? that women just sit back and get shit? Seems like a pretty good deal to me.”
        Not only that, but what about the Jerks/Idiots out there? I have NEVER heard about them actually giving away anything but a bunch of problems. They ONLY want sex.
        So, if you’re a woman you can just sit back, do nothing and receive.
        If you’re a Jerk, sit back and get laid.
        Everyone else have to give and hope for the best?
        Sounds like a scam to me.
      - skw
        
        Another good point. parkey, what do you say to all the asshole jerk boyfriends out there that treat their women like shit, but still get women ? (for example like the one I pointed to in the article above)
      - skw
        
        “Feel good, meet women, indiscriminately make them feel good, have fun.”
        
        Feel good about what ? the fact that I’m not a rwandan refugee with his arms cut off?
        
        “If you’re doing this, aren’t trying to trade for affection, aren’t trying to lock them down into something, they will start giving you all the opportunities you could want.”
        
        But thats inauthentic, the only reason Im trying to make them laugh is BECAUSE I want to fuck them. That’s just the plain truth. Honest and direct.
        
        Which Marni advocates here:
        http://www.winggirlmethod.com/…
      - Parkey
        
        You don’t want to give and certainly not for the joy of giving, you only want to receive.
        
        Forgive me for saying the women are making the right choice.
  - Ardiana the adventurer
    
    Hi skw,
    Yes men are supposed to act with courage over that of women’s. That’s what makes men men and not women. Because we are suppeed to be predators and Choosers instead of “the prey” and “objects” that are chosen we also must carry a higher amount of responsibility unparalleled to that of women. Othwerwise we just appear as boys. God made men and women different. You seem to have somewhat of an equalistic mindset going on or are striving towards it judging from your comment.
    Actually I thought “making someones penis smaller” meant that girls “talk” their exes penises smaller by gossiping about them to their girlfriends. ^_^ Didn’t know it was the woman who chopped off her guys penis lol. Maybe I should of left with the initial image
    - AJ
    - skw
      
      “God made men and women different. You seem to have somewhat of an equalistic mindset going on or are striving towards it judging from your comment.”
      
      Are you some kind of right-wing christian zealot? I hope you know that every feminist (true feminist) reading this would have you skewered in a heartbeat.
      
      “Yes men are supposed to act with courage over that of women’s.”
      
      Great, while we’re at it, women are supposed to stay home, cook, take care of us, suck our dicks whenever we want, obey our every command and follow our lead. That’s what makes men men and women women.
      Oh.. that’s sexist you say (or hell maybe you don’t?, if you don’t then kudos to you – you’re living in the 18th century, but at least you’re not a hypocrite like 80% of women out there)
      
      “Didn’t know it was the woman who chopped off her guys penis lol.”
      
      Yea it is, and Marni is completely out of line (she wont admit it though) by saying somehow the guy brought it on himself, just as anyone who says a jogger in central park at night brought on the rape herself by running around in short shorts at night in a park.
- Marni Wing Girl
  
  Thanks David- that is a great reading of what I meant! Of course I wiuldn’t advocate violence, or say that as women we don’t have faults either BUT I would like guys to get more honest, direct and more considerate in their break ups. This isn’t just for the woman’s benefit: clean breaks help everyone
  
  Marni
Graham

I live in Ecuador where Lorena Bobbitt (two t’s) was born. She received a hero’s welcome when she visited here is what I heard. So, how did she get away with cutting off her husband’s dick and years later HE apologizes to HER on Oprah?

I was dating an Ecuadorian woman who expressed concern I wouldn’t return to Ecuador after a needed trip back to the States. I’m from the States and had every reason to come back to Ecuador – Ecuador is home. That conversation was our last meeting. She wouldn’t answer my calls, my texts or my emails. Nothing.

Or going back a couple years, after a girlfriend broke up with me three times and came back twice, the third time she says, “I’ll call you.” Never did, but three months later walks up to me with a big smile like we were long, lost friends after seeing me at the store and greets me with a new beau by her side. (I’d been told.) And I’m supposed to be happy to see her?

It’s not how I’ve behaved toward any girl or woman I’ve ever dated.

Bad form, Marni, to use acts of violence to support your positions, even in jest. For all the political correctness heaped on men by women, let’s at least show a degree of intolerance for anything suggesting violence against anyone – men included.
- skw
  
  “Bad form, Marni, to use acts of violence to support your positions, even in jest. For all the political correctness heaped on men by women, let’s at least show a degree of intolerance for anything suggesting violence against anyone – men included.”
  
  Graham, this might be too much intellectual thinking. this just proves how much our media and society has compensated (over compensated really) for “unequal treatment” of women.
- Marni Wing Girl
  
  Hey Graham
  
  I totally agree: violence on any side in a love relationship is intolerable.
  
  It sounds to me like whilst logically you knew you were going to return to Ecuador, that your ex-girlfriend felt that her emotional neds weren’t being listened to: and I think this is where the conflict arose. And in the case of the second girl you mentioned it sounds like she was uncertain about what she wanted and didn’t know how to end things (women can suck at breaking up with guys effectively too!)
  
  If that scenario happens again and a girl is uncertain about you, take action and break it off. There will be women out there who are certain about you
  
  Marni
Marni

SKW – I most definitely will. Ha.
- skw
  
  nice to know you think you’re superior to God. why so humble though?
Jamiel Cotman

I think point 2 is sooo deep because I seldom view an x-girlfriend as a future dating asset.
This sounds caveman-little-boyish…but deep down, she is no longer any good to me! No, I’m not bragging, or saying that I have to beat women off of me with a stick. Its just that I grew up thinking if you’re not sleeping with a girl, could be sleeping with her soon, e.t.c. that the chick is useless.

Though I’ve changed now, none of the guys I hung with then, or myself had attractive friends that were also platonic.
Nope.
Wasn’t allowed.
Daniel112

Skw take it easy dude
- skw
  
  sorry bro, I tell it like it is. unvarnished truth no candy coating – can you handle that?
- skw
  
  sorry bro, I tell it like it is. unvarnished truth no candy coating – can you handle that?
timtron

Well is it ok to realllllllly be honest? Like reallllllllllllllllllly? As in can I tell her “look I’m not attracted to you anymore, compared to that hot hot chic over there…. sorry..” – would that be fine? Thanks for youre help
- Marni Wing Girl
  
  Well there’s honest and then there’s unnecessary information that is just a bit mean! Instead I’d go for, “I’m sorry but I don’t think we should see each other anymore; because I respect you & care about you as a person I have to be honest with us both, and admit that I don’t feel that same connection anymore”
  
  That give the same message but communicates it in such a way that isn’t going to leave her with a ton of insecurities
  
  Marni
timtron

Well is it ok to realllllllly be honest? Like reallllllllllllllllllly? As in can I tell her “look I’m not attracted to you anymore, compared to that hot hot chic over there…. sorry..” – would that be fine? Thanks for youre help
Kevin

I was dating this girl I met, After the 3rd date I realized this wasn’t going to go anywhere since we had nothing in common, and no real chemistry. I just picked up the phone and called her, it went to voicemail but I left her a message and told her “it’s not working and that I don’t feel any chemistry and that I didn’t want to just disappear like so many other guys do” She’s a very nice person, but the conversations between us was becoming like pulling teeth.
- Marni Wing Girl
  
  Hey Kevin
  
  I think that’s pretty ok: it’s definitely better to be honest than just drop off the radar, cheat or start treating her badly. I’d just keep the explanation relatively short (unless it’s a long term relationship) to spare everyone’s feelings.
  
  Marni
skw

By the way, I think maybe its women that need a bit of instruction on how to better choose guys, otherwise stories like this wouldn’t happen

http://www.abc4.com/content/news/top_stories/story/Online-predator-Internet-Casanova-sighted-in-Salt/fL14vzBcB0G43tCC-xuWlQ.cspx

in my view, these women got what they deserved, by falling for someone just because they’re good looking and charming. Sometimes what you see is not what you get.
- DingChavez
  
  I agree.
  I have no particular problem with a woman who likes the way a certain man actually looks. My issue is with the charm aspect.
  Some guys don’t have that Casanova charm, but they might look good.
  Seems to me that if a woman can take the time and energy to try to reform a degenerate jerk into a nice guy, they can take about half that energy and transform the nice guy into a charmer.
  Odds of that working are a LOT better than the backwards way they go about things.
DingChavez

@Parkey

I hear your points and think I understand where you are coming from.
I really like reading skw’s posts because he is asking a LOT of the same questions I have as I read Marni’s posts.

I do believe Marni is sincere in her efforts to help people and believe she believes what she’s saying.
It is important to point out the inconsistencies, hypocrisies, and just general confusion in some of her assertions. Why? Because it will help her see what we need and keep us from becoming more confused than we already are.

A lot of these blogs have an accusatory vibe to them. That somehow if you don’t agree with them to the letter you are “creepy.” That you need to “Man up.”

The hypocrisy is that women want to lie, manipulate, play games, and be generally immature in their dealings with men, but they want us to be upfront, forthcoming, and transparent. If a woman wants to dump a guy, she can just dodge his phone calls, or make a legitimate sounding claim (that she’s busy with work or death in the family), or just be flaky and somehow all of that childish behaviour should be tolerated and is somehow acceptable. How is that supposed to work?

They date men who CLEARLY only want sex, but put up their guard around some guy who may not be very smooth with his opening line and call him “creepy.” He might want sex too, but at least you can probably get him to buy stuff for you or fix things around the house or at the very least do traditionally courtship behaviour in exchange for the sex. Makes perfect sense to me.

Skw is putting this stuff out there. See, Marni herself has said many times that Women can “smell” a fake. Well, this is obviously not true. They can smell a guy who is not an idiot/jerk and punish him accordingly. So, if we are going to be able to become “Alpha Males”, Jerks, or whatever class of men that get to date the ladies we desire, we have to actually BELIEVE in this stuff.

The easiest way to do that is to understand what we are supposed to be doing and what we are supposed to believe. If we don’t we are simply going through the motions and be sniffed out.

Will Marni’s methods actually work on men who have had abysmal records with women? Can a man fake being an “Alpha Male” well enough to trick a woman’s nose? Is it possible to learn where all the “land mines” are in order to avoid the simple mistakes that will get you labelled “creepy” and be rejected? I don’t know. Maybe, Maybe not.

I DO know that having a clear understanding of the situation, acknowledging the inherent flaws and at least realising that we are playing a game that is a). not at all fun and b). stacked heavily against us, will give us a better than average chance of succeeding.

@skw keep making those posts and asking those questions.
DingChavez

@Parkey

I hear your points and think I understand where you are coming from.
I really like reading skw’s posts because he is asking a LOT of the same questions I have as I read Marni’s posts.

I do believe Marni is sincere in her efforts to help people and believe she believes what she’s saying.
It is important to point out the inconsistencies, hypocrisies, and just general confusion in some of her assertions. Why? Because it will help her see what we need and keep us from becoming more confused than we already are.

A lot of these blogs have an accusatory vibe to them. That somehow if you don’t agree with them to the letter you are “creepy.” That you need to “Man up.”

The hypocrisy is that women want to lie, manipulate, play games, and be generally immature in their dealings with men, but they want us to be upfront, forthcoming, and transparent. If a woman wants to dump a guy, she can just dodge his phone calls, or make a legitimate sounding claim (that she’s busy with work or death in the family), or just be flaky and somehow all of that childish behaviour should be tolerated and is somehow acceptable. How is that supposed to work?

They date men who CLEARLY only want sex, but put up their guard around some guy who may not be very smooth with his opening line and call him “creepy.” He might want sex too, but at least you can probably get him to buy stuff for you or fix things around the house or at the very least do traditionally courtship behaviour in exchange for the sex. Makes perfect sense to me.

Skw is putting this stuff out there. See, Marni herself has said many times that Women can “smell” a fake. Well, this is obviously not true. They can smell a guy who is not an idiot/jerk and punish him accordingly. So, if we are going to be able to become “Alpha Males”, Jerks, or whatever class of men that get to date the ladies we desire, we have to actually BELIEVE in this stuff.

The easiest way to do that is to understand what we are supposed to be doing and what we are supposed to believe. If we don’t we are simply going through the motions and be sniffed out.

Will Marni’s methods actually work on men who have had abysmal records with women? Can a man fake being an “Alpha Male” well enough to trick a woman’s nose? Is it possible to learn where all the “land mines” are in order to avoid the simple mistakes that will get you labelled “creepy” and be rejected? I don’t know. Maybe, Maybe not.

I DO know that having a clear understanding of the situation, acknowledging the inherent flaws and at least realising that we are playing a game that is a). not at all fun and b). stacked heavily against us, will give us a better than average chance of succeeding.

@skw keep making those posts and asking those questions.
- skw
  
  “@skw keep making those posts and asking those questions.”
  
  You just gave Marni a heart attack. I think she and many others were able to sleep at night thinking I was some lone lost case out there, with nothing better to do than cause problems.
  
  Shame on you man, for thinking.
- skw
  
  “I do believe Marni is sincere in her efforts to help people and believe she believes what she’s saying.”
  
  I believe it to an extent. A truly sincere person will take criticism the same way they take praise, and mend their ways accordingly. I believe most of the people she comes into contact with don’t really need help. She once told me,
  
  “Go get fixed and and I’ll unblock you” .. or something like that
  
  Unblock me from what? If I’m able to go out into the world and get rejected 100 times and not feel any worse off because of it, then what unblocking would I need?
  
  I liken this to a financial analogy.
  
  For any financial transaction, theres a “bid” and an “ask”
  
  A sellers sets an asking price for what he’s willing to sell at, a buyer sets a bid, for what he’s willing to pay.
  
  With my experiences, theres only so much “shifting” I can do absent any external results. Thats the highest I can “bid”, yet a womans “ask” price is just way too high, she wants me to do all the work, take all the risk, etc etc. Now some guys who don’t get rejected a lot, maybe they can meet that asking price with their bid. I cannot. What I need is a woman that can lower her asking price (ie, she has to do some of the work) to meet my bid.
  
  and thats the bottom line.
skw

coming to think about it, why would anyone need to “break up” like a man? Obviously they acted “manly” enough to get the girl in the first place, and if they got her and are in a place to break up with her, then they should just do that however they want, like a man or wallaby or a pigeon.
skw

Here’s another reason why women should think twice about ditching the nice guy for the jerk, badboy:

http://news.yahoo.com/former-u-va-athlete-gets-23-years-slaying-205329017.html
- Ding Chavez
  
  @dd03154df528fdc2945478a5e199b1f0:disqus
  These stories are always sad to hear, but I’m never surprised.
  The victim probably saw a bunch of Nice Guys and called them wusses or Creepy.
  I don’t know when Nice turned into Creepy and Jerk turned into Mr. Right (even when he’s a homicidal maniac).

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