How To Read A Woman’s Eyes

Did you know that a woman’s eyes can tell you EVERYTHING she is thinking in a matter of seconds.

I have been spending the past few weeks analyzing how to read a woman’s eyes.  And I discovered a few simple things that I wanted to share with you. But as I started to write this article,  I started to realize that trying to describe eye contact in written word,  is a difficult task.

SOOOOOO I decided to make a video.  Actually 2 videos!

The first video is a video of me talking about my recent discoveries on eye contact.

The second video is of me interviewing my super hot Wing Girl Natela, on how to read a woman’s eyes.

Here’s some of what is covered in the videos:

– What we’re saying with our eyes when we do XYZ

– Why we make eye contact

What it looks like when we are attracted to a man

– What it looks like when we are nervous around someone

– What it looks like when a shy girl is expressing she likes you through her body language

What it looks like when we want to be approached

– Plus more!

After watching the video I would love you to write any comments, additional information or opinions you have in the comment section below.  Enjoy!

Click play to watch our eye contact explained!

Women are subtle little creatures. If you don’t learn to spot these tiny little things we do, you will lose out on many opportunities with women. And I don’t want that to happen to you.  Learn how to decode a woman by discovering what’s inside a woman’s mind. Read more….

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  • Dan

    Thanks Marni & Natela 🙂

  • paul

    Very helpful! Thanks Marni. Especially the part about looking away somewhat quickly when attracted. I’ve been working on not doing it quite so quickly myself…, but it seems to be a built in response and it’s helpful to know that women can have the same thing.

    • Marni Wing Girl

      Glad you liked the article Paul 🙂

  • Larry

    I have Asperger’s Syndrome, and the subtleties and nuances involved with body language and eye contact escapes me. I am intrigued by it, but I am just not attuned to reading subtle emotions in people.
    I can initiate conversations with woman, but It rarely goes beyond the acquaintance stage because I am not very good at connecting the dots. I think that women who do not know me well feel uncomfortable around me and probably view me as aloof and distant. Aspies have to develop their ability to touch people in a social way and make eye contact, which I have done. I can be very engaging and funny with women I like. But it seems to me that women never really loosen-up with me like I’ve seen them do with other men by touching them in a teasing, playful manner. I know that I am not unattractive and I have a lean, athletic build–that is not the issue. It just seems that there is some aspect of me that is missing that prevents me from connecting with women in a meaningful way.

    • Marni Wing Girl

      Hey Larry

      I’ve worked with guys that have Asperger’s Syndrome before and I know it can be harder to understand, and then respond to, subtle nuances.

      The more interactions you can have, and female friendships you can form though, it will become easier.

      Good luck for the future

      Marni 🙂

  • doug

    Those two videos are helpful, especially the “bail-me-out” eyes. That infers opportunity bungled ; BUT:

    “be normal”? … or “be yourself”?

    What if the man is a real timid shy one?

    How is he supposed to get the ‘shot’ of confidence to start AND carry a conversation?

    • Marni Wing Girl

      I think all guys have the ability to be confident: just think about how you talk to your best friend. I udnerstand it can be tough when you’re on a date with an attractive woman, but if you can relax, and just be your best self she will like you. So don’t try to do/ say things to impress her, instead focus, to begin withm on enjoying yourself and relaxing.

      Marni 🙂

  • The second video is helpful, but I could not hear the first one well enough to understand what you are saying! I had the volume up all the way and still could not hear you!

  • wildwest

    I couldn’t hear it very well, either.

  • Tim

    Not bad! I think some live stuff woulr be great. Like with 2 ‘hidden cameras’ (woooo I know I know), but one really can’t tell as well with you 2 doing the faces together. If you could see a real guy’s expression, and hers one after the other that would be way better. Much more real. My biggest take away was when you said ‘If I check a guy out and he catches me…I feel like I got busted’, but that you like him. Different than when you said ‘if I don’t have any interest I will just make eye contact…’ That was really good info too. So if the looks away like she got busted, and we all know what that feels like, go talk to her! Thanks-T!

    • Marni Wing Girl

      Thanks for the comments and technical pointers Tim 😉

  • Parkey

    Something that I, as a hypnotist, did immediately notice in what you were both doing Marni was that you were giving some good examples of the NLP eye accessing cues. For example, whenever you stopped to consider something visual you were looking up. When Natela was thinking about how a certain situation would make her feel she looked down and to her right.

    Cool eh? 🙂

  • Parkey

    Something that has happened for me on several occasions is that I have made eye contact with an attractive woman and deliberately held it, keeping a strong but warm feeling inside myself.

    I’ve had the response that she’s looked away, looking quite shocked and uncomfortable…. but then a minute or so later guess who just happens to be standing right next to me, or sat across the train aisle from me.

    And then when I’ve said hi, even though she will be giving the impression she’s completely ignoring me, the response is an immediate pivot toward me with an “Oh hi!”

    Would love to hear a female account for this rather wonderful phenomenon. 🙂

  • pat

    men, don’t “NOT” look at females we think are hot or even mildly attractive. what causes a woman to stop looking? sounds like women are just as shy or more-so than men if that’s the case-
    do women wonder why we don’t approach as often the signals are really distorted.
    on the other hand, I wouldn’t want to be a hot chick getting approached everywhere I went either. what a dichotomy in terms of wanting to approach or not.

  • skw

    “Women are subtle little creatures. ”

    Why can’t women be more direct?

    • wildwest

      It’s like the old song:

      On a wagon bound for market
      There’s a calf with a mournful eye
      High above him, there’s a swallow
      Winging swiftly through the sky

      “Stop complaining,” said the farmer
      “Who told you a calf to be?
      “Why don’t you have wings to fly with
      “Like the swallow so proud and free?”

      Nature isn’t fair and it doesn’t care. So we learn to go nature’s way and find peace or complain and find no rest.

      • skw

        So – just so I get this straight, it’s your opinion that women are inherently “subtle little creatures” and this is not socially programmed ?

        “Nature isn’t fair and it doesn’t care”

        It is if you are an attractive woman, wouldn’t you say?

      • skw

        btw, too bad you weren’t around when the civil rights movement was going on, can imagine your discussion with the leadership:

        MLK – “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.”

        wildwest (and others) – “Nature isn’t fair and it doesn’t care, so we learn to go nature’s way and find peace…”

        • wildwest

          Oh, come on. You know there is a difference between nature and law. Unjust laws can be changed. Nature cannot. You cannot stop floods and hurricanes, and you cannot stop scorpions from stinging. This site is dedicated to sharing the results of research about the nature of male and female brain differences and behavioral dynamics. If you have research that proves otherwise, share it. Until you do, I have nothing more to say to you.

          • skw

            It’s funny you talk about nature and law.

            Do you know that there was “scientific research” that “proved” black people were inferior? There was even a mental disease name given to those slaves that escaped or wished to escape captivity, because of course a black person that thought he was equal to a white person was clearly mentally ill, right?


            As for research that proves that men and women are clearly socialized to believe certain things, it’s definitely out there. but here’s just something a 5 yr old could understand… cuz five year old said it!


            “Girls want rincesses, and girl want superheros”

            “Companies try and trick the girls into buying pink stuff”

            I guess you’re also going to tell me now that women are biologically predisposed to buy pink stuff?

          • Parkey

            Women are different, mentally and physically.

            If the man can’t give the woman the things that she can’t have on her own why would she want him. We should be thankful we as men are different; the day women are approaching me, leading me and grounding my emotions is the day I no longer have anything to give them.

  • skw

    If the answer to that is, “it’s the mans job” then what can I as a man point to and say, “that’s the woman’s job” ?

  • Jeff

    Your lil’ girl cuteness comes out some time (a great complexion helps!) Love the lip gloss too.

  • Mark


    DO you think the initial response and the “oh hi” encompasses a bit of “looks rejection” as in she would respond differently and more openly to a hotter man initially and later? Thats how Im bred to interpret it and Id be very interested in your angle on this….

    On a separate note, skw, and possibly others, you need to get into this Mike Patrick, Im starting to pull round to the belief that looks arent everything in terms of what females find important but one small part – it will NOt stop me from becoming the best looking I can cause I find them important but possibly worth a view to see what is really reality….

    • Parkey

      I don’t think there’s actually such a thing as a “looks rejection”.

      I would say the “bad vibe rejection” certainly exists though.

      My interpretation of your “looks rejection” Mark is that you are approaching women and looking to them to see if they respond positively or negatively to how you look. You are looking to see whether attraction exists or not, instead of understanding that it’s you that creates it. Bad vibe – you aren’t leading, you’re following. Attraction doesn’t come from how you look, it comes from how you feel and act.

      Women will give you more benefit of the doubt to create attraction if you’re physically hot because they’re conditioned to expect it of you if you are. If, though, you don’t take that chance to lead her to attraction and instead keep stepping back to question your own self image and looking to see if she’s creating attraction on her own, it’s almost certain you’ll lose her.

      That’s my opinion.

  • skw

    “Women will give you more benefit of the doubt to create attraction if you’re physically hot because they’re conditioned to expect it of you if you are”

    Exactly, which in and of itself is an indication of attraction towards the male. more benefit of the doubt is like lowering the “action potential”

    Ie, they smile at you more, laugh at your jokes (no matter how bad they are, and believe me good looking guys can’t tell jokes for shit, as a student of comedy, and someone who’s actually tried stand up comedy for some time, I know this) the benefit of the doubt IS them being attracted to you.

  • skw

    ” it comes from how you feel and act.”

    which in turn is greatly dependent on how you look.

  • skw

    “Women are different, mentally and physically.”

    Again anything to support this other than your opinion, the physical component, yes, agreed.

    but I think you should have a talk with this 5 yr old, who’s clearly more intelligent than you

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  • Mark

    Point taken Parkey. ALhtough in a sense looks plays the indirect role, but yes this doesnt tell me whether i look hot enough or not, because the insecure neediness trumps any good looks I may or may not have. My own experience proves you right on this but without rendering looks as anywhere near completely meaningless.

  • Mario

    What could be the meaning if you ask a question to a woman, and she instead of saying “yes” or “not” looks down and avoided to answer. It happened wiht a woman woho used to travel in the same bus with me and had the habit to sit just in front of me.

    • Marni Wing Girl

      Hey Mario

      Not answering you is a strong ‘blocking’ gesture that suggests she felt uncomfortable speaking to you. I would definitely recommend dropping me an email, or having a read through my blog to try to identify why you didn’t come across how you may have wanted to: as I’m sure you’re a graet guy that women would love to meet

      Marni 🙂

      • Fabian

        I need your help Marni, please – “…give it to me baby”


  • bignose

    its all about the confidence, so why is it such fun destroying it

  • Darrell

    Marni, I like the eye contact lesson very much….especially the thing about believing in yourself and not being attractive if you don’t have that belief. I’m a very humble person and I speak softly but carry a big stick……People say that I exude a lot of confidence but inside of me…..I can be a coward at times….anyhoo…thank you for the videos and I will continue to work on myself to become irresistible!….I already have it…’s just being able to put it all together in a complete package. Sincerely….

  • Po Lux

    Great Job indeed! Women’s language is totally different from the one of men but very interesting. Reminder; a woman is an emotional being hence much more subtle and thinner….. we have to learn i Thanks for sharing!