Smile Cheat Sheet: The Flirty Smile vs. The Polite Smile


Women are cultured into thinking they need to be nice, sweet, and polite to EVERYONE…so naturally…we usually are…EVEN if we’re not interested in you.

Coincidentally, this can be really confusing to guys when they’re genuinely interested in a woman.

So in order to tell the difference whether she’s gazing adoringly at you or just smiling out of social obligation, I had one of my trusty wing girls write this awesome blog about the difference…

Here it is!


Smile Cheat Sheet: The Flirty Smile vs. The Polite Smile
By: Allysa Pappas

Everyone knows that awkward feeling when you catch someone’s eye and sort of give that half-smile – you know, that “Oops, now I have to acknowledge that I see you” smile. But how do you know if it means more? How do you know if she is actually flirting with you? Below I’m going to give you a quick Cheat Sheet on how to tell if the smile you’ve just received is a polite one or a flirty one!

The Eyes:
I’m sure you’ve seen my video on “smirking” and this is something that all women do, and WILL do when they are trying to flirt with you. It’s subtle yet speaks volumes, and one of the biggest cheats I can give you. If she is smirking her eyes will be just slightly squinted, but still have some depth behind them, like there is something more she is trying to say. The smirk exudes confidence and that’s what you want to look for, a confident smile is a conscious smile, not one that is just being given to be nice.
BONUS: This works wonders for guys too… I urge you to practice and master the smirk and use it on women you come across, because what do women love? CONFIDENCE. Here is the video for reference:

The Mouth:
Do this with me right now. Turn your mouth into a tight half smile. Doesn’t feel genuine, does it? This is a great example of a polite smile that says “I’m literally just trying to not be rude because we accidentally caught each other’s eye”. A true, flirty smile will re-shape the face, and along with the eyes changing, you will see it in the cheeks. Practice these two versions in the mirror as well, you will notice how you face adapts to a real smile and can better gauge it when you’re on the receiving end.

Also, a flirtatious smile usually comes a half second after the eye contact. This smile is usually slow and sultry – think shy and sweet – not quick and forced. The speed of this type of smile is key because the longer you linger, and the longer she tries to keep your attention, the more intentional and deliberate it is.

The Double-Take:
I have to be honest. If I accidentally caught your eye and was smiling to be polite, I will make it my mission, as long as we are still in the same building, to avoid any possibility of that happening again. Promise. But, this cheat is simple – if a woman gives you a smile, looks away, and then looks back a second time, you know that she is not just trying to be polite, and that there is something about you that intrigues her. Even the most confident women get nervous and embarrassed easily, so by looking back over at you hoping to catch your eye again, we’re definitely giving you a bit of a signal.

So next time you’re out at the grocery store, gym, or bank, and you get a smile from across the room, consider these 3 cheats to help you tell if what you received means a little more than: “Oh shit”.


Awesome stuff right?!

Reading a woman’s smile is one thing, but being able to read her body language…and knowing what to do AFTERWARDS is what’s gonna take you to the NEXT LEVEL with women…

Find out how to get nothing but “I want you now!” signals from any woman you want

Most guys don’t know how to read women…but imagine if you had the secret code to not only understanding them better…but attracting, dating, and seducing absolutely any woman you want…

Well wonder no more…because I’ve compiled absolutely everything you need to know about becoming the man that every woman wants everywhere you go.

So stop hesitating and click here to discover the secret to attracting any woman you want.

Once you have what it takes…women will give you a lot more than smiles at the mere sight of you ;-)



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  • skw

    would be grrrrreat to get pictures also

    • KevinS

      Why do you want pictures? You’d call it all bullshit if she did post them.

  • skw

    instead of teaching us to interpret 15 different smiles, how about teaching women to actually say what they mean and feel honestly. Oh. that would mean women actually had to change and do something. can’t have that.

    • Ding Chavez

      THANK YOU!

      I agree 100%.
      Fix the women and you fix 100% of the problems with dating.

      Win/Win situation.

    • MD

      What have you done recently in regard to approaching women?

      What effort have you made?

      Women are individual human beings. They don’t owe you anything nor do they need to conform to your definition of fairness. Why should the “burden” (as you think of it) or the “pressure” fall on the women when you remain resolutely unwilling to stop trolling on this site and actually do something out in the real world?

      Women don’t owe you honesty or the truth of their feelings. They owe you nothing. It’s time to put some effort in.

  • Rich

    Knowing the difference between a fake smile and a real smile is useful, but even with my limited experience with cold approach I can tell you that there is no way to tell how a woman will respond when you say “hi” to her. Looking for a green light from women can be long, long wait. Also, often the very act of looking and waiting is unattractive, because it’s passive. You have to take a risk and be proactive.

    • skw

      right, and women have the privilege and luxury of not taking that risk.

      • Rich

        Irrelevant, even if it were true.

        Take action and figure out how to get results, or do nothing and get nothing. That’s our choice. Whinging about how it’s not fair is very much the latter.

        • skw

          It is true, and relevant, in a discussion where women constantly complain for an equitable society where they are treated like equals.

          I’m all about taking action, and I came to marni to figure out how to get results, I’m not for taking action blindly, and I’m for figuring out how to actually get results, not spend money to get no results.

          • Rich

            So wait until you hear of an action that will work, then act on it?

            How will you know when you’ve heard the right solution?

          • yureon

            apparently all what Marni here says IS the right solution. But somehow someway many of us can’t seem to “get every girl” “everytime.” I for one know that there is no “method” that works. You are either someone the want or not. And we know for a fact that it is someone with looks money and power.

          • Rich

            Why moderation? Seems completely random!

          • Rich

            That’s marketing hyperbole and it’s obvious that that’s what it is.

            Be realistic. People need to have the freedom to say no before they will choose to say yes. That’s why there’s no infallible method for getting a yes. It’s quite normal that if you say “hi” to a number of women only, say, one in four will go on to a conversation, one in four of those will exchange numbers, one in four of those will go on a date, one in four of those will kiss you, and so on.

            Do the maths. That’s a lot of women and yes most will “reject” you (if that’s the right word – I don’t think it is). Do you think it’s reasonable to meet two or three women, not sleep with them and conclude there’s something wrong with you, or your method?

          • skw

            “That’s marketing hyperbole and it’s obvious that that’s what it is.”

            If Marni is honest and has an iota of integrity, she should refrain from using such hyperbole and be completely honest about what level of service she can provide.

            Where are you pulling your numbers from? what scientific study?

          • skw

            In fact, what numbers does she guarantee? Look, if she decides to enter the space of taking people’s money in exchange for success with women, and us making huge radical shifts in our lives. She’s not selling us toasters or tube socks here. This is potentially life-changing stuff, I wonder if she even takes that seriously?

            isn’t it fair for us to ask what exactly she can and will provide in terms of results? Any other customer would ask that very question of the business they’re purchasing from. Yet when we do it, it’s us “being negative”… right.

          • MD

            Are you a customer? Have you ever paid for Marni’s products, services or coaching? You talk of “fairness” but all you do is troll here and criticize Marni. Is that fair?

          • yureon

            Well if there are actually methods…(which I know there aren’t I was just pointing out through sarcasm that it’s not honest to say those words..any, all, every,) then yes it is resonable to question or consider if there is something better.

            Here is some more realistic maths for you.
            About half people in the world are female 3.5 billion.
            I live in the U.S where ther are 150 million. (So hear you can pretty much rule out the remaining, 3.35 billion. Now of that 150 million, 149.9 Don’t live where I live.

            Now out of about 35,000 about 12,000 are women, keep in mind these women can be or are, married, old, young, lesbian, engaged, in a relationship, strippers, prostitutes, escorts, nuns, ones that will find me too short, not handsome enough, too poor, not high enough status, wrong ethnicity, wrong age, etc etc etc.

            So yeah it’s not that easy so hearing methods that facilitate and garuntee me results would make me innocently believe that there are ways I can get around this…of course I was sleeping at the time and just woke up and realize without the aforementioned attributes, it just won’t work.

          • skw

            Send me the entire contents of your life savings. you’ll get happiness down the line.

            What’s that, you don’t think you will? well stop being so logical. just do it.

            why do you need to have reasons why sending me all your money will make you happy. it will, because I say so. and if you don’t believe me, you’re just in your head.

            Hmm.. doesn’t seem so crazy to actually think about what people are asking you to do, before you actually do it.. does it?

          • skw

            still waiting for that check.

          • skw

            still waiting for the check, must be mail delays.

    • yureon

      ” Also, often the very act of looking and waiting is unattractive, because it’s passive. You have to take a risk and be proactive.”

      That seems to not have to apply to women.


      Share ›

  • John Handy

    Interesting. Trying to figure out how to approach women to get them to like you isn’t really the hard part. The hard part is accepting two things: one that they very likely already like you if you are just normal and don’t try too hard or “work” to impress them; two, see rule one. Here’s some other signs a woman is interested in you: if she works to fill in that so called uncomfortable silence. If she maintains eye contact. If she smiles while maintaining eye contact. Remember the goal too: it’s to look for a connection not necessarily to to “make” something happen. Start the relationship and get comfortable with this process with all women.

    You will start to have the sustainable capacity to attract women which comes with being naturally attractive.


    Why you need to be dating multiple women at the same time

    • yureon

      LOL how about we actually secure one first before even thinking on how to get a second or third. Women can date multiple people easy men, not so much.

      • Ding Chavez

        I second that!

        Most guys have hard enough time meeting one, much less multiple women.

        I agree, dating multiple women is the best strategy, but it only works if you are rich or look like George Clooney.

        • MD

          Erm…most guys have a hard enough time meeting one woman?

          You can go to a bar on a Saturday night and meet loads of women.

          We call it socializing.

          • Ding Chavez


            Come now MD. You know what I mean.

            I’m talking about women to date. You can “meet” an army of women, but I’m talking about collecting phone numbers, then going on dates.

            Besides, I’m not the “bar” type.

          • MD

            You can meet a lot of women to date. You can get a lot of women’s numbers. Doesn’t have to be in a bar. Can be anywhere. It’s just not true that most men have a hard time meeting one woman. People mix with people. Some find it more difficult than others but there’s millions of women out there.

  • Clueless in paradise

    Typo in the first paragraph of “the mouth”. I think you mean your face not you face. Love what you do for us clueless guys. Thanks a ton.

  • blogster25 .

    Women are cultured into behaving nice and sweet? Dating sites continue to perpetuate this without specifically pointing out examples of it occurring. I’ve never seen this occur. In fact, women today are constantly told how awesome and empowered they are.

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  • polywan

    right article,i believe women like this