What Does Being A Nice Guy Actually Mean?

What Does Being a Nice Guy Actually Mean?

Are you the nice guy? Do you constantly let her have her way? Do you go out of your way to please her? Does every relationship you have end with the F-Word – FRIENDS?

“Nice Guy” is a Matter of Perspective, Yours and Hers

His Definition:

Nice Guy: Noun, Informal. A likable man who is generally pleasant to be around who avoids conflict in order to please those around him. Enjoys an anxiety-free environment and will make others happy to ensure a peaceful co-existence.

I know you think that you are being a gentleman by giving into her every whim. I know that you want to go out of your way to make her happy, never wanting to argue, always letting her win.

However, in reality Mr. Nice Guy, you lose! You are being a doormat. If you look deep inside yourself, you probably don’t want to rock the boat out of your own fear of losing her. Yet, the only woman who appreciates this guy is her mother.

There is a reason this guy doesn’t get the girl. Generally, women don’t want to date a doormat. If they need one, there are plenty of cute ones at IKEA.

I see this guy every day in my business, and I know you can change. I am not asking you to become a complete scumbag because that doesn’t work either. You need to change your definition of Mr. Nice Guy by understanding what a woman really wants.

Change your Definition of Nice Guy and Get the Girl!

I hear women say, “I need a nice guy” all the time. As a woman, I know what they mean, and I can assure you it is not your version of Nice Guy.

In the song Yeah! by Usher, there is a line, “We want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed. “

Well, I hate to shock you – but women are no different!

Her Definition:

Nice Guy: Noun, Informal. A man who exudes confidence and oozes sex. The guy who is in control while treating her like a lady in the street, and makes her want to be a freak in the bed

So how do you get there Mr. Nice Guy? Let me help.

Stop trying so hard to be nice and be yourself.

Women know you’re a man, and they know you want sex. You just have to learn to provide the subtle clues while being a nice guy.

You can build sexual tension in a nice way.

While you are busy being nice, let that little bad boy out every now and then. I am not telling you to get all perverted, but innuendo and well thought out touchés, can go a long way.

Don’t be a doormat!

I can’t say this enough! Women enjoy the thrill of the chase as much as the man does. If you allow her to walk all over you – she will. And guess what, she will get bored and eventually use the dreaded F-word.

So what is the true definition of a nice guy? A man who can balance kindness with sex appeal

Women actually do like a man who will not tolerate her crap! But you need to find the right balance. There is a true art to being Mr. Bad Boy – Nice Guy. Do you have it?

Let me know what you think it is in the comment section below.

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  • Elwin4

    Self respect

  • Alex

    I can confirm it is *so* easy when you get this right – like night & day. Now I just need to get it right consistently – and of course the more stunning the woman, the more difficult that becomes..

  • Rey927

    Great article!! And it really does come down to having self-respect…just “Be a Man!!” lmao.

  • Joe25

    “Women actually do like a man who will not tolerate her crap!” So what it a woman’s “crap” and why is she not growing as a person and getting ride of or learning to control her own “crap”?

    • Simon

      women need to test you, because if you can’t control her, then you can’t protect her from the world,
      like when the army puts a bunch of recruits thru a test situation, and see which ones lead, it’s not about dominating other people, it’s more of a dance, a request rather than an order,
      and then she needs to test you with ‘no’, do you get angry, sad or sullen?
      your every word, gesture, expression betray what you think your relative status is, so you need to be confident and casual while asking for a lot,
      from sales theory, you first ask for a small reasonable thing, then ask more and more, like a dance, you move her around, with her permission,

      • Dallas

        Great job dude. You nailed it.

      • Eugene C

        I do not understand! Joe is correct in his assertion about, “So what it a woman’s “crap” and why is she not growing as a person and getting ride of or learning to control her own “crap”?”

        When women are giving you the “S-Test”, she is manipulating you. Manipulation is a form of deceit. Deceit is one face of lying.

        Here’s an unpopular thought for you: If a woman lost her virginity before marriage, she is defiled (which is most of them). They are like a piece of chewed up bubble gum on a dirty park bench.

        If you choose to eat that particular piece of bubble gum, would you take any crap from that particular piece of bubble gum?

        Women DO NOT need to test you. Testing you is an insult and puts her on a pedestal, contrary to popular belief.

        If woman cannot take you at your word, she is calling you a liar. But, think back through your past interactions with women… many of them consider it an insult if you suggest they have not been forthright.

  • B.D.

    I don’t kn0ow what the rest of you got out of this, but to me it really doesn’t say much. It’s way too general. In fact, it’s a generalization of a general idea to start with.

    • Tom Hanna

      I find most of her articles and material to be as you describe. She’s the dating coach equivalent of a fortune-teller: speak in generalities, and it will resonate with everyone.

      • Sami Turk

        Except that unlike fortune tellers, she’s not charging for these so called generalities. This is just meant to provide some perspective on things.

        • bravesrule384

          @ Sami – and just bc Marni is a woman, she thinks she knows all of them, which is hardly the case.

  • Henry

    women like to say “he’s a nice guy but”.

    what’s hysterical is they all know what that means while us guys are left confused.

  • John Donald

    Be a gentleman with an edge and you’ll be good as golden.

  • Dallas

    Great article Marni. Have an edge. Don’t supplicate women. Tease them the right way and they are putty in your hands. No “douching” necessary.

  • lnnn

    .” Yet, the only woman who appreciates this guy is her mother.” Her mother or his mother?

  • Ze

    Very
    interesting article. Full of truth. The problem is where you define the border
    between a nice guy that commands respect and admiration, and doormat. if
    someone could come up with a training guideline, That person would make a
    lot of Money. Most this articles focus on the pickup arena, but I am only interested
    in regular women. Someone you meet at a friend’s gathering, an old friend that
    you suddenly fall in love but are afraid of damaging the relationship, and more
    regular situations

  • John Smith

    Teasing a girl only makes her think you see her as a friend with benefits at the most – or just a friend at worst.
    You’re making her look at you as she would look to her brother. Brothers tease their sisters. Friends tease their friends. You don’t wanna be that.

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