Women Reveal How To Get Out of The Friend Zone With A Girl

I recently surveyed 3587 gorgeous and amazing women to find out:

1. If it’s possible for men to escape and/or avoid the friend zone

2. If they’ve ever had a guy, they viewed as a friend, become more than a friend

3. What that guy did to get out of the friend zone

I’ve posted some of the responses below so you can see what these women said. These are just a sample of the responses but overall about 2/3 of the women who responded said YES it’s possible and  YES they’ve had a friend that turned into more.

 

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 Barbra Said YES:

Yes, it happened to me.

It all depends on how the guy behaves with me over time. If I see that I can trust him and that he’s loyal and takes care of me, and makes “moves” to get out of the friends zone, yes, it can happen

I live in Europe (Paris). I am Italian, and the guy is from London. I met him through a dating site (OKC) two years ago.

Never considered him more than a friend, because he was not exactly “my type” physically speaking. But I guess I was wrong.

Natalie Said YES:

Well, yes, I believe a lady can change her mind, and her label, if she so chooses to do so…  and a guy can help her change her mind, but first, the guy has to show her that he is interested in her, as more than a “friend,”  before he puts the hard word on her, or tries to make any move in that direction.

If the guy goes blindly ahead, and makes a move on her whilst she is still considering him as a “friend”, she may become very confused, angry, perhaps even insulted, and the guy could do irreparable damage to the “image” his lady friend has of him..

But, on the other hand, if the guy can tell her he is looking at her as more of a partner, or talk to her and explain his new feelings about her,  before he makes his move, then the lady is in the right frame of mind to accept or reject his advances, as a prospective new partner.

I really believe that it can, and does happen, but one must take precautions, to ensure that both parties are thinking the same way.

This has happened in my own situation, and I have seen it happen to two of my friends, at different times.  We all sat down and talked about the whys and wherefores, and figured that the lady must have an opportunity to “re-label” the guy (change her ideas of him, and think of him in a totally different context) and as long as the guy did not just “take the plunge” before she had a chance to process these new thoughts.

Sadly, in one instance, the guy did just go ahead and try and make a move on her, and consequently she slapped his face, and demanded to know exactly what he thought he was doing…!  She had only thought of him as her friend, blah blah blah…   an instant mood killer!!

Well, these are my thoughts on the issue Marni, I hope I can help you in your findings, and you can help more men and women to understand each other better, and make this World a happier place.

Julie Said YES:

Yes, I had a friend that turned into a long-term relationship for 6 & 1/2 years. He asked me out after we’d known each other socially for at least 5 years. I was curious so I said yes, and the rest is history.

Louise Said YES:

Yes – I worked with him too for 4yrs …… he was my best friend (at work anyway) ……. we got on really well, and on Monday mornings he would tell me all about his weekend (looking back probably trying to impress me – but it had the opposite affect at the time lol) ……. usually about dancing with this girl and once saying two of the girls he was seeing turned up on the same night etc etc …… I think you get the picture……. I really liked him as a friend – but seriously thought he was a jerk when it came to women.

I ended up marrying him & was married to him for 20yrs……. it turns out he was trying to impress me – but was actually inadvertently pushing me more and more into the friend zone without realizing it!


Cherie Said NO:

No. I have never slept with a male friend!!  I keep my friends as friends.

Anne Said YES: 

Yes, it is definitely possible for a guy to move out of the just friends zone with me.  Here is how:

If he takes the time to listen to me and learn how I work, what I’m about and what matters the most in life to me then he will have everything he needs to speak my language and show me how much he cares about me.  For example, I am all about making others happy.  I am happy when I see others smile so if he notices and appreciates that part of who I am then it means a lot to me and will gain my interest because he paid attention.

Most of all if he can learn and speak my primary love language then he will quickly begin moving out of the friend zone and making me wake up to the possibilities with him.

Every woman wants to feel loved and appreciated for who she is, not who she could possibly be to a man.  Showing me that he cares about who I am right now and loving me unconditionally no matter what I look like is what I look for in a potential lifelong mate.

 

Sofia Said MAYBE But It’s Never Happened To Me:

I wouldn’t say it’s impossible but it’s definitely not easy. I’ve friend zoned a few guys, two of which attempted, really intently to get out of that zone to no avail.

They were very good friends of mine and one still is, but as much as I like who they are and our ability to share things…the passion just isn’t there. They fill(ed) a different and also necessary role in my life, but they were friend zoned because for one reason or another I don’t see them as a good long term match for me. In my case they wouldn’t be able to change their “status” simply because it’s related to their nature and I know better than to try to change a man to suit me.

 

Lisa Said YES:

I think the answer is yes. I had a friend who I didn’t consider to be anything more. I didn’t find him attractive in that way, but I loved his company. One day he just grabbed me and kissed me! It was such a confident kiss, and I change my thoughts then and there. We dated for two years. So I always say to my friends to kiss them before they rule out a great friend. Because there can be nothing better. Tell them to be confident, we like that.

 

Ruth Said YES:

Yes, it does happen and the instrument was flirting and gentle teasing, just occasionally ‘getting under the skin’

 

Oksana Said YES:

I can say that it my life I have several cases when friends became something more. And interestingly enough when this something was over, we actually remained friends.

Again, these are just a handful of results but I have 1000’s more just like them.

Most women I talk to, have a story where a guy friend was able to become more and all he had to do was slightly shift his approach and take action.

Do you want instructions on HOW TO TAKE ACTION and shift your approach?  Read this article

OR

Click here for a step by step guide book on how to get out of the friend zone with a girl.

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  • Great post Marni! It’s always interesting to hear a woman’s perspective. It’s definitely possible for someone to get out of the friend-zone if you choose to do so and make moves in a socially intelligent way. I actually enjoy making many female friends as they introduce me to their girl friends where there is already some comfort and attraction set.

  • roberthagedorn

    What a mess. Obviously, the best thing to do is to stay out of the damned friend zone–what a curse. Lisa’s “friend” couldn’t take it anymore, so he grabbed her and kissed her, with good results. Natalie’s girlfriend’s “friend” did the exact same thing, and got his face slapped. It’s time to make a distinction between “friend” and “acquaintance.” Anyone in the friend zone is not a friend. They’re just an acquaintance, someone with whom to discuss the weather and nothing more.

    • BillK

      Yep – I didn’t know I was in the FZ, and just went in and kissed a woman and she seemed to enjoy it.

      The next time and thereafter she said I “took her by surprise” that first time and made it clear it would never happen again.

      Either way, at least it does clarify where you stand.

      The thing is, the guy got his face slapped only because he was a “friend;” if there had been any attraction she would have been thrilled, so it’s actually almost the only way to find out for sure.

  • Emily Tung

    Actually for me, the friend zone is a pre-requisite. I like to know that whoever I end up with can at least be my friend, no matter what happens to us, and I like to really get to know each other well before anything intimate happens. If a guy was my best friend, and seriously wants to date me, I would be very happy to give him the chance over some attractive stranger. I don’t know many people that operate this way, but I think this is a great system and I end up with a lot of quality friends. Usually we get to to discover each others secrets, be very open and honest, and be our real selves, and we find out whether or not we would be compatible before any sort of dating happens. Saves some heartaches. That’s my take. As long as you are my friend, you have potential. Plus this way, I can compare my choices and choose wisely, without hurting people’s feelings and leading people on. I think the only downside is that my friends end up competing against each other sometimes. I also like this system because it takes off that pressure of when a guy wants to “get something” out of me, instead of just enjoying each others presence. It’s a lot of pressure and they don’t act like themselves anymore.

  • bravesrule384

    Marni – I posted about this article on your FB page a year or so back…but the article that came out in USWeekly in 2013 (or 2014) about Cindy Crawford’s marriage to Rande Gerber. In it, she clearly states him and her started off as friends and they will always be friends. She states it raises the level of the relationship.

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