Of course we do. We just want to be able to make the choice to have sex.
Speaking for myself, as a woman, I like sex. It's fun and it feels good. What's not to like.
I will be honest and tell you that I am a good girl who used to be very prude when I was younger.
The reason i was so prude was that I was uncomfortable. Uncomfortable with boys, my body and myself.
Not a good combo if I ever wanted to have a mind blowing sex life.
When I was 18 I went backpacking and safely kissed my way up the east coast until I met a very special guy who totally broke me out of my shell.
The first time we were making out he said to me “I want you to be comfortable. If I do anything that makes you nervous or uncomfortable, just slap my hand and I will stop.”
I can tell you there was no hand slapping and I got very comfortable.
The reason for this was because I felt that I was in charge of my sexuality. I was getting to make the choice and that alone put me at ease.
Women want to be sexual. Women want to be sexy and women want to live out crazy sexual fantasies but they need to feel safe and secure.
They want to know that they are the ones making the choice and not being forced or pushed into being sexual.
I never want to feel judged or pressured. I don't want to be tossed in the slut category and therefore I am very conscious of who I give my sexuality to.
Women want to be unlocked. Trust me. Even the purest of pure want an adventure.
As men, you can give women a safe place to be sexual. Just like my backpacking friend did for me.
Next time you are getting intimate with a woman, try his move and I promise you will get great results.
Adonis, beautifully said. yes. sadly, i do think the ‘freeze out’ – as taught by mystery and style etc. IS designed as a form of punishment. i DO think it’s explicitly that. i think what you’re describing isn’t a ‘freeze out’ it’s a . . . ‘warm-in’? or something less lame. even the name ‘freeze out’ says it all. you’re going cold on her. and you’re pushing her out. you’re disconnecting from her. you’re punishing her. with what we’re talking about we’re actually leaning out BUT staying connected at the same time. it’s about creating more warmth and safety –… Read more »
Tad,
The second is not my choice, but neither will I force anyone to adopt my values, only explain what I perceive to be the consequences of each. Just because my life philosophy is one way doesn’t mean such choices do not exist and it would be naïve to do so. The same choices are made every day in business, politics, and even amongst the various social interactions of other animal species.
EasyEC
i am sad that the second option would ever even be an option for a man.
i am sad to see these compared as approaches with equal value and merit.
It seems to me that if a guy isn’t near what he perceives is the attractive ideal of women he’s interested in, he has two general choices:
(1) become more like that man–his body language will be a reflection of the philosophy that guides his actions.
(2) become a better lier–he can become aware of his body language signals and consciously project those which are congruent with the desired image.
Just as there are pick-up advocates of both directions, so can LMR be approached differently, for better or worse.
This topic screams out for an audio track.
I love the others. Very Enlightening!
This post illustrates why I support you and your advice as a woman over all the other “wannabe” female dating coaches trying to give advice. It is honest and practical and you know how to put things in a way that guys can actually use.
This is the kind of female honesty men need to hear.
hi marni
i think that this is not correct
bcz u r not a good girl as u saying and u r not an honest yourself i think u want to do sex with any one it can be a girl or boy
Very well thought-out response. However, it is well-known that the vast majority of women fake orgasms. Why? The best answer I have ever seen comes from a book published in 1982. Very famous best seller. Author is Naura Hayden. The reason virtually all women fake orgams is because, in a nutshell, men “bang” the hell out of women. His hard pelvic bone “banging” against her soft clit is at best uncomfortable and and worst painful. Naura outlines a very specific technique to guarantee a woman an orgasm every time. Not sure I can mention the book here but google Naura… Read more »
Being a woman myself I can tell you that there are plenty of reasons why women fake orgasms. For one, women fake orgasms because their man just doesnt know how to satisfy them. And I do not entirely blame that on men. If more woman spoke their minds and told guys what they want and what feels good to them then men would know where to touch, what feels good, what hurts and so on. But men have to understand that women are not the most comfortable beings, but the more comfortable we are, the more open we are. Second,… Read more »
It was March of 2008. I was talking with a dude in the UK who’s into Pick Up stuff (he’s into “The Game”) I was telling him about this woman I’d met who’d come home with me. And how we’d been making out and then she’d said she didn’t want to go any further. He asks me, “Did you give her the freeze out?” I feel disappointed. And a bit sick to my stomach. And i tell him so. For those who don’t know the term, the freeze out is basically a way of pressuring a woman into having sex.… Read more »
Hi Marni, You did what I hoped you would do and discuss “faking.” Very informative. Thank you. The book I referenced is called How to Satisfy a Woman Every Time and Have Her Beg for More. Naura Hayden. 1982. David Deangelo even mentioned it as a book to read in one of his seminars. Naura faked all of her orgasms for years because every man, without exception, was such a horrendous lover that she would pretend anything to get him off of her to stop the pain and/or boredom of his “banging” hard on her soft clit. The most open… Read more »
A little word on how a proper “freeze out” (I hate that term) would be exactly how Tad describes what to do. If you are doing a ‘freeze out’ properly there should be no neediness whatsoever…which is why so few guys can actually do it right. Personally I rarely have to do freeze-outs because I almost never get LMR (which is a whole different topic) but on those few occasions when we do experience it… All I do is step back, relax, & turn of my internal sexual energy. But it has to come from a place of internal security… Read more »
Hey Marni, How are ya mate? Alex from Sydney here in down-under! Well……….Yes you are right!Woman do love sex as much as men!LOL!It’s true and no one can’t say that is not true! I will give you perfect example! I was married for 10 years!We have 4 boys but we are separated! Why? Was it her(wife) or was it me? I used to blame other people for my mistakes!For God sake and I was thinking that was happening all the time!But not! It’s up to you and your personality to shape up and get along with the life!I was like… Read more »
Alex, thank you for writing that. Happy you have opened yourself up.
I know that women think about sex as much as men. I can really only speak for myself when I say that I think about sex more than the average woman, as much as men, if not more than men. I love sex. And i have to say that its all about the orgasm (for me) because it isnt. I’ve always been the giver. In life in general, but mostly in sex. I love knowing that I’m pleasing my partner. I’m exactly sure if it has to do with power or what. I know that it increases my pleasure. I… Read more »
I realize that I’m bringing a thread back from the dead here, but…. as a WGM customer I’m allowed to right? :Q So the freeze out is a bad thing? Give me a break! Marni, you said you’d met Mystery right (somewhere I heard you say that)? Do you not know his teachings? The freeze-out is his technique! Search “freeze out pua” on google and it will come up with a youtube video link! I still don’t undersand why women are expected to be treated as vulnerable, indefensible, emotional eggshells while its quite acceptable for men to be neglected for… Read more »
Probably no one going to read this, but this whole thing is an oxymoron. Women want to feel like they’re the one’s making the decision? WTF? Then what is this I hear about how a woman wants a confident man who knows what he is doing? Sorry you can’t have both because it begs the question to how does he know what you are feeling or thinking? That is how you get into a sexual rut because he feels trained. I just enjoy the ride and never refuse him! Ever! When American women “get” this, their relationships become a whole… Read more »
I agree with you Marni… My goal isn’t to just toot- it and- boot- it. My goal is to leave her better, more satisfied as a women then when she came in. To EMPOWER HER! make her feel feminem and sexy! Do women love sex? of course, they do!.. They’re little horn dogs(pun intended) Underneath the proper “good girl” image… deep down with a man they can trust,is comfortable leading, who can take them, dominate, control and ravish her!!! they want to reveal to you all their naughty and dirty desires ;)… let them be the naughty girls they luv… Read more »
I would have to say yes because my hubby is awesome in our bedroom / playroom! Because both me & the hubby love trying new things together sexually for we just simply love pleasuring each other on a daily basis, but we both do tend to like the 69 position to pleasure each other orally & then to finish each other off with the good ol classic of course of the missionary position, so he can thrust me as hard as he so desires with that long, beautiful waxed silky smooth erect 23 cm’s of manhood of his deep into… Read more »