The setting is perfect, you've laughed and talked, maybe had a few drinks and some good food. Everything is mellow and romantic. You lean in. Further. Further. And your lips meet—air? Or slightly better, the smooth cheek of your shy girl friend. You pull back in surprise. Her eyes are shuttered, her smile embarrassed.
The most common reason is that you missed the all important “come hither” signals that girls give out to let a guy know they want to be wooed physically.
You missed the “Kissing Code”, which can be further understood based on her body language signs.
Lucky for you, I'm here! First, let's breakdown the body language a girl uses who IS NOT want interested in being kissed to save yourself the time, confusion, and embarrassment from NOT knowing:
- Body Language Signs #1: When a woman avoids making eye contact with you, pay attention. Its' a cue that means she is just a shy girl and feels nervous. However, if she looks around the room or over your shoulder she probably wants to be elsewhere and is not interested.
- Body Language Signs #2: If the girl you're with purses her lips frequently—compresses them so they are very thin or even disappear—she could be trying to give a sign of irritation, boredom, or impatience (none of which are harbingers of an impending lip lock) signifying she isn't just shy, and that she might not like you.
- Body Language Signs #3: Keep an eye on her overall body carriage. Is she tense and circumspect with her arms and torso? When a girl keeps her arms folded, holds her hands in her lap, or hugs herself around the chest she is attempting to make herself as small as possible to avoid contact, again indicating she is more than just shy, and doesn't like you or isn't ready for a kiss.
- Body Language Signs #4: As for her conversation, a girl is not interested in a kiss if she purposefully steers talk away from anything personal or intimate. A girl will speak in a normal voice and keep a fair amount of distance between her body and yours.
Ok now that we've got THOSE signs out of the way, here are a list of signs that are gonna be your GREEN LIGHT to go in for the kiss…because once you see these signs I can guarantee you the girl you're with likes you, hoping you are reading her signs, and is waiting for you to give her a kiss, even if she is shy:
- Body Language Signs #1: Her eyes are softened and slightly narrowed—this is the “dreamy” expression–and she keeps dropping her gaze to look at your mouth. This indicates that she is imagining her lips locked with yours, thinking of how much she likes you.
- Body Language Signs #2: If she is licking or lightly biting her lips a lot (especially in combination with the first point) it means she is making sure they are soft and pliable.
- Body Language Signs #3: What your parents told you was true: if a girl hits you it's because she likes you. Gentle slaps on the arm or leg, and seemingly casual touches to your face or hands all hint at her desire to be close.
- Body Language Signs #4: Listen to her voice as well. If it dips in tone and becomes slightly breathy the lady is inviting you into her personal space for a secret.
If you still can't seem to decipher the Kissing Code your date is using, settle for a kiss on the cheek, but linger near her face for a moment and allow her to make the choice of taking it a step further. When all else fails, just ask her if she would mind a little lip dancing.
A lot of girls are just extremely timid or shy and will do everything BUT make the first move, leaving you to make some educated guesses about what she's thinking and feeling about whether or not she likes you based on the body language signs above.
Here are some bonus signs for you to keep in mind when considering signs a shy girl likes you based on her body language:
1. Don't SURPRISE her: If you're not close to a woman, making good eye contact and speaking seductively; you're doing nothing to communicate that a kiss is coming her way. If you try to make out with her out of the blue, she will react with shock because it is not a pleasant surprise. Plus, you'll miss out on all the fantastic anticipation we feel as women when we can read that a kiss is coming.
2. Don't use CHEESY lines: Another great reason for communicating that you want to kiss a woman through your body language, and eye contact, is that you get to avoid those cringe worthy chat up lines. Lines like, “How would you rate yourself as a kisser?” just makes my skin crawl! Kissing is natural, you don't need to use a line to initiate it, you just need to be good at reading the signs a girls body language is trying to use to give you that says she's shy and she likes you.
3. Take it SLOW: Start off slowly and gently, then gradually build up to a more passionate kiss. Kissing is an incredibly sensuous act for a girl and it is amazing foreplay. It also gives us a little hint about how we might continue on with you as lovers. Just like how you wouldn't dive straight into sex, without the foreplay; you also want to take your time with a kiss.
Follow these tips and whilst you may not have an Oscar's worthy first kiss every time; you'll still be more likely to receive another.
Kissing is only the first step when it comes to seducing a woman…and sadly a lot of guys don't get past the initial kiss.
If you wanna know how you can take things even further once you guys have already gotten past the hot and heavy make-out sessions, then I have just the thing for you…
I had an amazingly interesting (and highly sexual) talk with a girlfriend of mine about exactly what women want when it comes to “taking things a step further”
You can check out my Let's Talk Sex with Darrah De Jour here and get everything you need in order to get (and keep things) super hot between you and your lady all throughout the night.
It's an unedited recording of myself and Darrah talking about what all women want sexually from men.
Here are just a few things we cover:
– How to avoid performance anxiety
– How to calm a woman so that she is open to doing what you want in the bedroom
– Does size matter?
– How to properly use a smaller penis
– How to touch a woman (how long, where to touch)
– How to escalate to sex
– How to talk about safe sex
– Can all women have vaginal orgasms?
– What to do after sex
– How to have 1 night stands
First impressions are everything…so make sure you give her a lasting one and listen to the MP3 recording of “Let's Talk Sex” call with Sexpert Darrah de jour by Clicking Here.