In order to attract a woman, you want to form an emotional connection with her. But you also want to make sure she knows you’re not a pushover. Striking this balance can get really tricky really fast: You don’t want to go overboard and offend her, but you also don’t want to just agree with everything she says. Here’s how to stand up for yourself in a way that keeps her connected, instead of turning her off…
Ever been out on a date or two with a woman and you thought things went great… Only for her to disappear and never reply to your texts or calls? If you have, you’ll know how frustrating it is. Especially when you have no idea why she went silent…
Did she get bored of you?
Did she meet another man in the meantime?
Have you got bad breath?
While any or all of these could be true, there’s another possibility that most men usually don’t consider. And that’s if there was any conflict between the two of you that could’ve made her feel bad. I’m not even talking about a full-blown argument or heated exchange (although obviously that would be a problem). It could be something that you felt was a minor thing, but it stuck out to her as kind of weird.
Usually it’s related to some kind of disagreement…
Or questioning her about something in a way that feels condescending, rude or invasive.
Again, it might not even feel like a big deal… it may just lead to a little bit of awkward tension. Now, for a lot of guys that I coach — who are typically left-brained, logical types — they often enjoy debating people about different topics. Like it’s a pleasurable experience to try and prove why their way of thinking is correct, and why the other person is wrong.
And while they may get some satisfaction from winning the debate… It can easily lead to losing rapport with that person, and creating feelings of negativity towards you. Now, I’m not saying that you can never debate a topic with a woman you’re dating.
But in the first date or two, you usually haven’t built up enough positive feelings yet to outweigh any negativity and conflict.
When you text her and ask her out again, in the back of her mind is the feeling from that kind of awkward moment from the last date…
And even if that was only 5% while the other 95% was good, it could still be enough to change her overall feelings about you… Especially if she’s got other guys texting her or she’s been on a couple dates with, where the energy and mood was much more positive.
Because if she already felt some kind of conflict with you, then she’ll be wondering if it’s likely to happen again… and that maybe you’re just not compatible together.
Ok, now here’s when things can get a little tricky.
If you have a couple of dates where you agree with everything she says, and there’s no tension at all, that can feel a bit boring. So what’s the solution? How do you challenge her and create attraction… Without upsetting her and creating negative conflict? The answer is to playfully challenge her on trivial things that nobody would actually get offended about.
For example, you might act outraged that she prefers white wine over red wine… Or question her sanity if she thinks chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream is better than cookies ‘n cream. You’re showing her that you’re not afraid to disagree with her or have your own opinion… But you’re doing it in a fun way that carries virtually zero risk of actually upsetting her or being rude.
Compare that to challenging her on serious topics like politics, religion, work, family, moral beliefs etc.
It’s super easy to create a bad vibe by suggesting she’s wrong about an issue that’s important to her… or that you just happen to have the opposite view. And especially for the first couple of dates, you want to avoid that kind of negativity.
Focus on having fun flirting and getting to know each other, without any kind of judgement or needing to be ‘right’ about everything.
This is where a lot of guys get stuck. Like I mentioned earlier, many are left-brained and their attempts at flirting can backfire. What they think is fun and bantering, can easily come across as obnoxious and arrogant. But because they’re not even aware they’re flirting wrong, they keep making the same mistakes and then get frustrated when women stop responding to them.
Or is some cases, they don’t even attempt to flirt at all because it feels so alien to them… like a foreign language everyone else speaks but they were never taught.
Yet for the many guys who’ve been through The F Formula program, that all quickly changes.
That’s because I break down what flirting actually is, in a systematic way, with tons of examples, so that anyone can understand it… Whether they’re a flirting novice or have been flirting for years. So if you want to consistently create attraction with every woman you flirt with…
Without creating conflict or getting negative reactions, then you need to go and check out the only flirting program guaranteed to deliver you these results.
The last female friend you’ll ever need,