Should you buy a woman a drink? Depends.
First ask yourself a few questions:
Are you buying this drink to be a gentleman?
Are you buying this drink cause it's polite?
Are you buying this drink so that she won't run away?
Are you buying this drink so she'll like you?
If you answered YES to any of these questions then DO NOT BUY HER A DRINK.
I think it is really important to acknowledge when you are doing things for others, and when you are doing things for yourself. Women are attracted to men who do things for themselves.
This does not mean they like selfish men, but women like men who are confident enough not to be lead by what others think or want. Not swayed by trying to please others.
So next time you think to offer a drink to women think about why you are doing it. If you are buying it because you want to and you have no “REASON” behind buying the drink then buy it.
If however you feel that buying a drink will automatically lead you somewhere with a women than 9 times out of 10 you will be sadly be disappointed.
Let me know what you think.
Well that’s why I would have fun with her first, and then in the end will never call her or talk to her again. 🙂
When you think about it, buying a woman a drink with the intent of getting some action is like another (variable) scale of prostitution depending on what “action” means.
Giving gifts in itself isn’t bad, but the question to ask is whether or not it’d make the girl feel cheap. If it does, would she appreciate feeling cheap?
Of course, a number of women might enjoy getting free (low-risk) drinks and even make a hobby out of it.
I rarely buy drinks anymore unless I do the joke thing or I say “tell me three cool things about you and I will think about it”…..that can either get a woman mad or if they have a good sense of humor (which seems to be pretty rare these days) they will play along…. I have been used in the past so much with the drink thing (because I was naive and have a very good heart – sorry ladies I know that seems to be turn off today) that I just do not even think about it unless its… Read more »
I think the concept of wooing women with money and gifts is an older way of attracting women, especially now that women make their own money and are much more independent. I also think that if you need to buy a women something just to keep her attention, you are probably not that interesting to her 😛
I only buy a woman a drink based on my terms. If I know her or she is a good friend of mine I would buy her a drink. However if a random girl was to ask me to buy her a drink, I would say: “I don’t even know you to buy you a drink.” “Let me get to know you a little bit and maybe I’ll buy you a drink.” “So what makes you a fun and interesting girl?” And if I like her enough that I want to continue the conversation I would tell her to go… Read more »
If a woman asks me for a drink I tell her “tell me a good joke first and then I might think about it” this works a good deal of the time and they find it amusing….
I had gone out with a girl who I saw as a friend. I bought her 1 drink that noght and a couple weeks later we were hanging with other friends and I bought her another drink. Somehow it came up in conversation that I had ulterior motives when I did not… Seems that it was suspicious that I had bought drinks. Another night, I had been socializing with another girl, but left for a while to go talk. She walked past and asked where the watress was. I asked if she wanted a drink. She said no thanks. I… Read more »
I’m gonna make an analogy with what Marni said in “Do women like sex as much as men?” column and ask: “Do women like drinks?” and assume her answer: “Of course we do. We just want to be able to make the choice to have them.” I agree that Buying Drinks is an older form. But it’s rather presumptuous too, implying a certain obligation. It’s also the Easy Way Out, requiring No Risk from the guy. If he had any balls he’d come over and ask her himself. So maybe that’s the thing to do….combine the two, and walk over… Read more »
If you pay attention to body language, she’ll probably have already chosen before you even approached (if she noticed you).
There are obvious signs, like a woman moving into your line of sight and then playing with her hair. There are also subtle ones that can be pieced together, like her feet/shoulders pointed towards you (while she’s engaged in something else) or her eyes not directly looking at you but out of focus (indicating a concentration on peripheral vision).
I really like this post by Easy EC.
It could explain how some men appear to have won a woman over by buying a drink when the woman was just waiting for him to get up the courage to approach and she liked him anyway.
In this case, it could show him as a capable provider, wrather than a drink being a bribe.
Hey guys thought I would throw my two cents in. I have argued and debated with many Guru’s on this point cause some take the “dont buy a girl a drink rule” way to seriously. If you wanna buy a girl a drink then buy it but like it was posted do it cause you want to not cause you want something in return.
When deciding whether to buy a girl a drink, I think it’s best to first consider the facts laid out in “10 signs she’s flirting.” You don’t simply approach a woman and offer her a drink. It’s a easy way to get taken advantage of. She may either take it and walk away or, worse, find a way to later weasel more drinks onto your tab. It sounds cruel but it happens. If you are already engaged in a conversation with a woman, if you can read signs of interest (sexual or otherwise), if there’s good rapport and she seems… Read more »
Whitney, I totally agree.
Just so men no women may sometimes play a little game, like I did when I was younger. It’s called don’t bring your wallet and see how drunk you can get for free! This was a game I played when I was in college but some women my age still have similar games.
Take your time and feel it out with a woman to see if she is worth the investment.
Okay then that makes perfect sense, ill ask a girl out too… Not because I like her, but because “I have no reason for doing it”…. So in your crazy world women have no independence or intelligence to make decisions for themselves??? Let’s face it! What other possible reason would you buy a stranger a drink for??? Other than being attracted to them? Girls want to meet people too, and they’re smart! They’ll do the right thing if they feel uncomfortable.
I came to this website for advice and got a face full of bull**** :S