Why oh why do you keep ending up in the friend zone? I am sure this is a question you are constantly asking yourself.
Let me try to explain why this keeps happening to you, by using an everyday example so that it may be easier for you to understand.
My friend is having a barbecue. There are all kinds of meat on the grill. Chicken, fish, steak, ribs, everything! I go up to the bbq and say I am so hungry and that looks amazing. I would love a piece of that meat. Can I have the one on the top shelf?
My friend will look to the top shelf, and see 10 pieces of meat of all different assortments. He'll then look at me and say “which one?” and I will say “the one on the right?” This does not help clear things up at all for my friend. He still has no idea.
Now, what if I were to change the way I was asking for that meat and said “Can you I have that piece of chicken on the top shelf second from the right?”. BINGO!!! My friend knows instantly what I am asking for. He will reach for that chicken and hands it to me. We are all happy. There is no room for confusion. He knows what I want and can give me exactly what I am asking for.
MY POINT: YOU KEEP ENDING UP IN THE FRIEND ZONE BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT ASKING TO BE IN THE ZONE YOU WANT!!!!!
It's time to live by a new rule. A new rule that will ensure that you never get stuck in the friend zone again.
RULE: As a man, you are allowed to ask for whatever you want from women.
Only Stipulation: You can ask for whatever you want AS LONG AS you are not hurting, lying or manipulating to them.
I have seen many men who do not live by this rule. They don't ask for what they want from women and therefore they don't get what they want from women. I believe they do not ask for several reasons:
- Fear of rejection
- Fear of being too obvious
- Fear of insulting
- Fear of being creepy
- Fear of causing discomfort
- Fear of being inappropriate
- Fear of getting what they wantAnd where does this get them? On a one way train to friendshiptown. Land of the sexually deprived and frustrated.
My advice, when you meet a woman you are attracted to, don't “befriend her' and hide your attraction with stupid questions like “who lies more, men or women?”. Be obvious, show your attraction and clearly state your intentions. This lets a woman know that you respect yourself, value your time and know you have options. SUPER SEXY!!!
Below is an email from one of my newsletter members who successfully learned the Secret To Avoiding The Friend Zone. My response and comments are below:
I wanted to let you know that I had an interesting couple of days. Out of no where a girl I was interested in a few months ago contacts me on Facebook. She wanted my number
so I gave it to her and she called me immediately.
She began talking with me about her current Boyfriend situation and I started flirting with her and keeping up the sexual tension. She was loving it. She had broken up with him and was interested in me but was torn about whether to give the BF another chance. She asked me out and we met two nights in a row for coffee, talked 2.5 hours the first time, talked
3 hours the second time. Lots of texting … or sexting actually and she told me I was making it hard for her to behave … but she had to decide whether or not to give her BF a second chance.
Eventually she did decide to give him one more chance but wanted me to know she was very attracted to me and since she is partially thinking her relationship may not work out she wanted me to know if things do not work out, she wants to call me, date me and get to know me. I told her I was disappointed and that I could make her no promises about being available and she said she understood. But she still said “Don't be surprised if I call you … hopefully you won't tell me you have a beautiful girlfriend already
but I have to give this another chance to work out.” I told her she would not hear from me and that if she wanted to talk the ball is in her court. She thanked me for being there and hinted that I may hear from her soon. We had a very good and productive conversation considering the subject matter and disappointment. I feel she was very genuine
which is unlike most conversations go.
Although things did not end up as I may have hoped, I was very confident, direct in my flirtation, and we had a fun and playful time for nearly 3 days.
I don't know if I will hear back and if I do, I am not sure if I should give it a chance.
Thanks for a listening ear and for all you do.
All I can say to you is BRAVO!! This was well executed. You took a chance on a woman in a slightly vulnerable position, held caution but moved forward to pursue your own wants AND THEN set amazing boundaries with her.
I think it's absolutely amazing and you will forever be seen as an attractive man in her eyes. Why? Because you continued to lead the situation in the direction YOU wanted, rather than settling for whatever she was willing to give you. Incredibly attractive and sexy.
Do you understand what stating your boundaries and keeping them does to women?? It turns them on!!!
When a woman learns that she can walk all over you, she no longer values you, at least not on a level of potential mate.
In my life, I have had many male friends. Several of whom, wanted more from me. I knew it, they knew I knew it, but neither of us said anything. Why? Because we were both “seemingly” getting what we wanted. I got wonderful male attention without all the emotional investment. He got to be around a woman he was totally attracted to without openly being rejected. Win, win right? Wrong. So unhealthy and so selfish for both parties involved.
These situations never ended well. My guy “friend” would close himself off to other women, putting all of his energy into showing me how great a boyfriend he would be and I would eventually end up dating another guy. I was never going to suddenly see something in my guy friend that would make me want to be with him. If he wanted something to happen, he's the one that would need to take action. And that action is asking for what he wants and be willing to walk away if he does not get it.
So next time you meet a woman, approach her and ask her for what you want, rather than asking for what you think you can get. Be clear, be straight and be direct with what you want and I can guarantee you will not find yourself in the friend zone.
The only way to get what you want is by asking for it!
Remember the only one sticking you in the friend zone is you.
Do you want to learn how to be direct, ask for what you want and ALWAYS get the response you are looking for?
Check out WGM's at home, instantly down-loadable program: How to Become A Man Women Want. Includes 9 hours of audio, video and written material plus bonuses that shows you step-by-step how to finally get everything you want with women. Click Here to check it out.