Have you ever heard of something called Hoop Theory?
I actually just heard of it the other day from a guest on my podcast. The Ask Women podcast. From my understanding Hoop Theory is when a man first meets a woman, she tries to get him to jump through hoops to showcase his value AND how dedicated he is.
Something you definitely do not want to start doing OR if you are doing this, it’s 100% not something you want to continue.
In this blog I’m going to explain hoop theory and answer the following questions:
- WHY women do this to men
- WHY men continue to do this with the women they like
- And How can you respond when a woman asks you to jump through hoops, be it buying her a drink or helping her fix her toilet, so that you can use that moment to create attraction
Let’s tackle the first question first.
WHY do women make men jump through hoops?
Women do this because frankly they can. It’s not like they are pre planning to take advantage of you and manipulate you into thinking if you just do this for me, I’ll do dirty things to you OR I’ll be with you.
They do it because you say YES!! And you seem to be okay with it and enjoying it, so why not keep asking.
If I ask you to buy me a drink and you say yes and buy it with a hop skip and jump, why would I think you didn’t want to do it OR that you didn’t like doing it OR that you wanted something else in return for it?
SO I keep asking for it with a smile on my face thinking that it’s okay to do this.
Onto to question #2. Why do men hoop jump?
I know some hoop jumpers, truly believe that if they jump through enough hoops, there will be a magical hoop leading all the way to a woman’s vagina…. but sadly this is not true.
The only thing these hoops are going to lead you to, is the title of her #1 slave boy that does everything for her but gets nothing out of it.
If you are a hoop jumper or have jumped through hoops from time to time, I do want to tell you that this title is not your fault.
It’s the fault of many men before you who told you, that in order to make a woman happy, you have to do things for her OR simply say yes to her every request.
The Secret Sauce
Do you know how many older dudes I’ve met who have told me that the secret sauce to their long lasting happy marriage is understanding that their wife is always right???
My blood literally boils every time that cliche statement is made to the point that I want to hit that old guy straight across the face and say “your wife hates it when you just agree with her which is why she’s constantly fantasizing about your neighbor” but of course I don’t.
I’m a nice wing girl. So I smile, look over at his wife and have a shared female moment of subtle communication that says “I feel you sister”.
The truth is that maybe this worked in the 50’s but it definitely does not work in today’s world!!!!
Or any date following this blog.
Women today are tougher and they’ve seen more. They’ve been played. Teased and jumped through hoops themselves.
Therefore having her always be right and doing everything she says is not going to get the modern woman hard.
What it is going to do is turn her off and train her to treat you in a sub par manner which sadly she learned from you.
Remember how they’ve always said you teach people how to treat you. This is an example of the truth in that statement.
Historically you have been teaching women that they can walk all over you. But no more.
Which leads me to answer question #3.
How can you respond to a woman that asks you to jump through hoops in a way that catches her attention and builds attraction?
You do something extremely simple but can feel challenging to do. When a woman asks you to jump through hoops, you make her jump through hoops for you first.
Getting her to jump through a hoop for YOU helps you take these moments when women asks you to jump through a hoop and turn them into attractive, playful moments that can instantly increase attraction and make her want you more!!
Here’s an example…
If she says: “Can you get me a water?” You can say: “Sure, but first ask me that question again but this time in a British accent.”
This isn’t a huge hoop for her to jump through. But it’s also not you hoping for it and saying yes Ma’am. Do you want cubes in that? Sparkling or flat?
When you say something like, most likely she’ll laugh … accept the challenge … then you do her the favor.
Now she sees you as an equal, someone she needs to respect and pay attention to.
It’s a fun way to build a good vibe between you.
What happens if a woman asks you to jump through a really BIG hoop. Like fixing something or picking her up from the airport?
Then the same principle applies. YOU ask them to jump through an equally big hoop in return.
She says: My toilet keeps doing that flushy thing that never ends. Can you come over and take a look at it?
And you say: I’ll fix your flushy thing if you bake me those super yummy cookies I love?
Do you see how simply NOT saying yes and putting the challenge back on her can be the first step in escalating things to a whole new level and creating fun tension that builds attraction???
I see so many men who get into awful cycles of trying to please and appease women they want to be with.
They are forever going to jump through hoops with absolutely no return on their invested time and effort.
These responses will stop the hoop jumping and guarantee you never have to jump through a single hoop again.
Instead women will be jumping through your hoops!
Remember you teach people how to treat you.
So start teaching women that you are a force to be reckoned with and a fun, challenging man that can rock her world.
Men who understand how women work will always have the upper hand with women. Let me give you a constant upper hand.
If you’re interested in having the success with women you’ve always wanted but didn’t think you could have then here’s what I suggest….
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Remember, finding the right girl doesn’t have to be hard…when you understand how women actually work.
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