04. Nov, 2011 
16 Comments
Touching can be a sticky thing when it comes to women.
Here are some general rules and guidelines to follow to ensure your touching attempts are well received and reciprocated. Instead of creepy and declined.
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What if I want to date the girl who works at say..a starbucks? Am I supposed to reach across the counter and touch her on the shoulder?
It’s all in the context, if it’s not appropriate then do something else, and use touching when it is appropriate.
Touching was a big “aha!” for me.
“Don’t look at me like that!” “Don’t touch me!”
That’s what they’d always say. You care, and you don’t like to upset people, so you listen and take this on board. Without knowing it you completely repress the core of your own attractiveness.
After years of being conditioned by life never to look at women with desire in my eyes, and never to touch them, I’m so glad I found this sort of advice. Thanks Marni.
Women love when you touch pussy. They become wet between legs.
This seems rather complicated… I feel like I’m going to be on a date and all have this running thru my head o.O
Kevin, that girl is like a waitress. You might want to be actively dating, with some more ecperience before you try one of those. Mark is right. Parkey, never apologize for being a man. Allways look them in the eye. Don’t stare,when checking them out; just take a quick look of admiration, not lust. Women can feel that, along with desparation. You don’t,”care”, but you do need to calibrate your actions to the girl’s comfort level and according to the situation. Winners never quit, nor do they give up. Be mindful of what Marni is telling you as well. She is great. Thanks, Marni, for all you do!
It’s the look you get then her body language. If you are going to go farther with her.
liten kevin very carefuly there is no secret or the right way of touching women.once i was with a love guru he told me the way i was touching women was wrong but women were loving it he was so up set that I had to fire him as my love guru.
Dudes, touching is natural, and it’s also natural to notice for yourself in the moment if a thing feels right or doesn’t. If it feels right, do it. If it doesn’t, don’t do it. When we’re really nervous, we sometimes can’t tell what feels right…that’s when good guidelines like Marni’s come in handy. Guidelines are just guidelines however…If a woman is looking at you with intense ‘kiss me’ eyes, and your gut says it feels right to do so – then you have the green light brother! Learn the guidelines then pay attention to what feels right – that’s my way anyhow.
LOVE IT!
As a woman – I agree with most of what Marni says – remember these are guidelines – not carved in stone.
Putting your hand on her lower back for a split second while opening the door to the restaurant can be natural action.
There is no hard and fast rules, and everything has to be taken in context of the situation, how long you´ve known the individual, how well, the setting,… I had a man gently caress my lower leg while reaching to the floor to retrieve a dropped fork. We were 3 hours into our first date, it was done in a way that worked and was very natural. The most important thing is that the contact is natural to the situation.
where are the other rules?
Hey Claudio
take a look through the whole video- and in the mean time here’s a quick recap:
1. Establish touch IMMEDIATELY – to show you’re comfortable being around her.
2. Don’t over touch – keep your touches light and brief.
3. Touch her special zones- these are her extremities where she’ll feel comfortable being touched.
4. Setting intentions – don’t land in the friend zone know what you want
5. Don’t be afraid to touch – keep out of your head and know that it’s ok to touch a woman in the right way
Good luck
Marni
Touching, like talking, smiling is just another form of communication. And good communication depends on many elements. if you are a good communicator things should come from your inner congruently. A touch is creepy when it’s not conveying what it stands for! I never have a problem touching my date for one very simple reason, if you guys get this, you won’t have to worry about physical touch and here it is: If you can touch a woman with your words, indirect body language and act like a responsible man, ain’t no woman in the world that’s going to cut your throat!
Any comments on this Marni?
Ok lets turn this around. I have a girl that I am interested in. She uses touch alot! it seems part of the way she communicates. Not hand holding but she might put her hand on my thigh for a second when she is telling me something. is this a signal that she is interested or is it just her natural way of being around someone. (have been in the “friend Zone” because she was married when I met her she recently divorced)
Hey Bill
You have to be a little bit careful here: touching you is definitely a sign that she’s comfortable around you but some women are just naturally more tactile than others. I would look out to see if she’s giving you any other clues too: does she lean in, seem really enthusiastic about what you have to say etc. And most importantly if you like her then just go for it: wait around for too long and you will be friend zoned
Good luck Marni