How To Kiss A Girl – JUST GO FOR IT!!!
10. Feb, 2012 
30 Comments
Just a shorty to prep you for your Valentines day dates on how to kiss a girl!
It’s a little video showing you exactly how women think about men who do not take action and go for the kiss.
Watch and learn:
Honestly, I couldn’t agree with this girl more. Nothing is more unattractive than a man who does not take action and go for it!!!
Want to make one little note, so that there is no confusion. I DO NOT wanting you being aggressive and forcing yourself on a woman. However, I want you to stop waiting for signs from her and go after what you want. If she does not want it too, she will let you know.
Remember, nothing is sexier than an assertive man who takes the lead!
Want to know what else women find sexy? Click here and let 42 beautiful, sexy, quality women tell you exactly what they want from men.
Great simple, straight forward advice. Just what us guys need to know.
Cheers
So Marni…
Can I kiss you or what?
You gotta lead by example shogo!!!! Don’t ask me. Do it!! Virtual Kiss
I’ve done this so many times, it’s painful to think about. Women like men of action, not men of words. (At least when it comes to making out.)
What about that poor girl on the Bachelor this week? Did anyone see that? (For the record, I only watch because it’s a good study of human behavoir and the male female dynamic.) The girl, who’s name I can’t remember, sat Bachelor Ben down and talked him through exactly how the kiss should go. “First we’re gonna have our mouths closed, okay? We’re gonna feel each other out a little… THEN, we’re gonna open our mouths, okay?.” She went on and on about how it should go down. It was a good example of what NOT to do, male or female. She got sent home that night.
That was it??? Ok, it’s simple but good to hear it from a woman.
I don’t even imagine myself asking a girl if I could kiss her… it would be like saying -I want to give you a kiss only to please You and not to please this desire I have to kiss your sexy and beautiful lips-. That’s what I think.
Glad to hera it- there’s nothing less sexy than a guy who asks for permission. I’m not saying be aggressive, but respond to her cues, take initiaitive, and if you get knocked back? Be cool, build more comfort with the woman, and (maybe) try again at a better moment
Marni
Thats really interesting.
I ‘thought’ that in the past when I had taken a girl for a stroll by the beach for example and asked if I could give her e a goodnight kiss…
A little sappy for sure, but I genuinely felt I was being polite and charming with a hint of old world manners.
Still today if I pick up a date in my car I would open the passenger door for her.
What are your thoughts on the opening of car doors in tis manner Marni?
Can a 21st century gentleman still be desirable?
Hey David
Yes I think gentlemanly qualities are great as long as they are combined with you still having an ipinoon, leading, being independent and direct.
These two ways of behaving can be complimentary, and not in conflict, with one another.
Marni
Hi Marni,
I know this doesnt have much to do with this specific topic but i have a question. I met a girl on the train a couple weeks ago and we kicked it off pretty good and i got her number. She recently moved here from new york and she’s a flight attendant. I know i should just ask her out but at the moment I dont have a car. I can get to where i have to but im not so sure how to go about this? what do you think
By the way we have texted a few times since then. nothing serious though
Hey Timbo
Three words: Go For It! As long as you don’t make a big deal about it- I don’t even think you necessarily need to mention it straight away- your lack of a car won’t be a big deal out of it either.
What’s more likely to make you lose out on your chance for a date here is not taking action: and leaving her wondering. So don’t let a lack of a car stop you from linking up with her and taking her on a date around her new city.
Marni
I’ve had so many hangups when it comes to connecting with women I’ve lost count, so it baffles me that men have difficulty knowing when to kiss a woman.
I kiss her when I know that she wants me to kiss her, or when I see it perhaps I’ll make her wait a little and build the anticipation a little. Kissing isn’t that big a leap when taken in the context of being just part of a steady process of escalation. I’ll know kissing is the next step because we’ll be touching each other, maybe holding hands, and she’ll be enjoying that I’m touching her hair or the back of her neck. She’ll be broadcasting “kiss me! kiss me! kiss me! kiss me!” with her eyes.
Finding a woman worth kissing. Now that’s the difficult bit.
Wow, dude, you’re growing on me LOL!
Your last statement is spot on! I think because of society the number of high quality women inside and outside is more minimal as time goes on but there are still lots of them out there for you, me and others
I’m interested that you have the confidence to know when they want to be kissed and to make them wait, this is one strategy Gambler talks about, and I’ve tried to get myself secure and “in the moment” enough to get to that level, but failed miserably. I take the kiss when its on, as I don’t have belief in myself for sustaining attraction over a whole date. And to be fair, I’m often dating for my own ego and the k-close is my validation, so the earlier that comes the better. Want to get by this immature and stunted level of confidence, but struggle to big time to be totally honest.
Great advice Marni.IF you are lucky
enough to find yourself in such a
situation.
Can’t speak for other guys but giving
someone like me this kind advice is
like giving stock tips to a guy who’s
in line at a food bank.
I would consider it a minor miracle if
I ever found myself in the position
where kissing a woman could possibly
take place.
You will, if you keep at it.
Marni’s point here applies at every step of the way from first eye contact through to sex. Don’t wait for someone to give you permission, don’t ask for permission, move forward and as long as she’s still comfortable keep moving forward.
You can make it happen.
Yeah but I don’t keep them waiting because it’s a strategy, it’s because I know that for women the anticipation can feel just as incredible as the thing itself. Anticipation is one of the biggest gifts that we as men can give them, but so few actually do. As long as she knows that you know that she wants you to kiss her and you’re comfortable to let the tension keep building she’s not going to go anywhere.
I also object to the PUA term “close”. They use it for things that I tend to hope are just the beginning.
Interesting so its not a push-pull or break rapport kind of thing you are doing but quite a beautiful act of making them feel even better.
Part of my problem is I don’t ever know that a women wants me to kiss her and that is down to lack of self-confidence rather than lack of knowledge, because if I see another man in the same situation I’d know the kiss would happen. Once the kiss has happened then of course I realise I’m fancied to some extent, anyway.
The PUA term close is a load of tosh, however, it is a good starting point for some as you know, just like the 3-second rule. I like that attitude of “just the beginning” and I like the idea of creating attraction rather than using “closes” as milestones. But I’m conscious of whats out there, especially in London, and that any hot girl can get a much hotter guy than me looks-wise and can choose to do so at the snap of their finger. And that is a factor in it all, or it wouldn’t be a worry in the minds of people like me. However, to bring these worries into situations where, because of my mindset, I focus on “closes” rather than holistically creating attraction, is a serious issue and I am clueless as to how to sort it out to be honest.
When a woman leans towards you then she probably wants to be kissed and you can sense it if you use intuition instead of thinking about it. Triangulation can be used to get a kiss as well. Most women don’t care about looks even if they say so. They usually say this because they are either not being honest or don’t know how the attraction between the sexes really works. Man is attracted to good looks, but not the woman. Woman evaluate man on their personality and body language not looks that can draw attention and nothing more. Women use good looking men all the time to get to the man they are really attracted to, giving the image of being desired. Most important thing with women besides confidence and self control is to be FUN.
Man that can make a woman laugh can make her do anything. – Marylin Monroe
And one more brilliant quote:
Women can forgive man anything but stupidity. – Oscar Wilde
Brilliance is an excellent attraction trigger because it’s very RARE in men since most men are either dumb or intelectuals. Combination of these few attributes that I’ve mentioned plus being good in bed is a desire of every woman and most of them don’t get to fulfill it.
Hey Miodrag
Thanks for your comments: I like a lot of what you’ve written here. I do agree that laughter, wit and being a confident, positive, person are key factors in attracting women.
Thanks
Marni
“Want to make one little note, so that there is no confusion. I DO NOT wanting you being aggressive and forcing yourself on a woman. However, I want you to stop waiting for signs from her and go after what you want. If she does not want it too, she will let you know.”
Is it better to be sure and go only when you know she wants it, or to take the risk that she doesn’t, being aggressive
I hope you realize how contradictory this advice is:
“Go for it! but don’t be aggressive!”
“Just figure out when she really wants it!”
Don’t look for a green light. Look for the absence of a red light.
yes agreed, yellow = green most of the time (though green = green virtually every time)
Do the lean in thing, like you’re going to kiss her, look at her lips, her eyes, her lips as you talk to her, make her KNOW that you are about to kiss her . . . and then back off and don’t kiss her. It’s the most incredible tease for a woman. Ten minutes later, do the whole thing again. Tease the holy hell out of her. Women LOVE that tension. Tease them. Make them hot for it, make them think they’re going to get it, then make them wait for it.
The third time, go in very slowly and bring your face right up to hers, move your head so your lips are practically touch (but not quite), and I’ll bet you $100 that SHE goes for it. Grab her and hold her tight for a full-body hug/massage/kiss that’s really deep, and then cut it off a little too early and turn away and start talking about something else.
Tease her. Deny her. Make her work for it. Don’t give her too much or it will dissipate all the sexual tension. With a huge smile, tell her that on a scale of one-to-ten her kiss was about a “Six.” Then lead her by the hand over to some very unattractive guy and tell her to pracitce kissing with him and you’ll give her a test later.
Later, go back to the face-to-face teasing routine.
Whaddaya think romance novels are all about? Teasing, sexual tension and anticipation, that’s what. If the hero nailed the heroine on page two, the book would be three pages long.
After you’ve kissed her for a short while, say, “I noticed you have a lot of kissable body parts.” Then just let her mull that over in her pretty little head for a while. Sexual teasing is one of the most powerful tools a man can use on a woman. Use it mercilessly to get her so turned on she can’t stand it.
Hey Boydner
I really enjoyed this comment: tons of great advice in here into the how and why of creating that attraction with women. Sexual tension is really important to us!
Marni
Hey Marni for ex I tell her that I want to be whit her then if she says ok i close and seal the deal sort of speak whit the kiss wouldn’t that be good ? telling her i want to be whit her like her whit confindance flirting anything any how and whit what you told me about women just an opinion
I have kind of a lack of confidance here or for the moment cuz what if I go for it to soon makes me to needy no? if I act to late then I show her I am not interested I have a lack of knowledge here some advice anyone give me a bone here (a small joke)
Act relatively quickly but not in a needy way. This comes from not needing another person but being ok to go after what you want. It’s the difference between saying ‘Can I get your number please?’ to ‘I’ve enjoyed speaking to you, let me grab your number, as I’d like to catch up again some time.’
Good luck
Marni
hey what if in stead of asking you say “what if I am about to kiss you”then you go for it
you give her short time to think on the answer and an sort of speak an warning in a good way but better you tel this at the ears so she will see it coming so what do you think?
I think it would be better to communicate that you are about to kiss her through your body language, make eye contact, move in slowly, tilt your head and let your actions do the talking
Marni