10 Ways To Get Her In The Mood

I am pretty sure I told you this already, but I write a column for Canada’s top male publication, UMM. My articles are in every issue 🙂

Here’s a piece I wrote called 10 Ways To Get Her In The Mood.

I am about to rock your world by revealing the #1 myth about women and sex.  Ready for it?

Women want sex just as much as men do, if not more than men. Women are sexual, sensual beasts waiting to be released by the RIGHT man in just the RIGHT way.

Here are 10 Ways To Get Her In The Mood whether you are dating, simply seducing or in a long-term relationship.

#1. Get Her Out of Her Head.

The #1 thing that blocks or stops women from enjoying a sexual/sensual experience is that thing on top of her shoulders. Her head. For women, sex is far more mental than physical. The more you help make a women feel accepted, attractive and safe during any sexual act, the more free she will be.  When you provide a safe space it allows a woman’s mind to free itself of insecurities and actually enjoy being in the moment. If you ease her mind, you’ll loosen her body!

** After reading this article – go watch my video on how to calm a woman’s mind so that she will do whatever you want! Click Here

#2. Calm Her Nerves.  

My nickname in high school was The Kissing Bandit, which was a fancy way of calling me a prude.

When I was 18, I went backpacking in Australia and safely kissed my way up the east coast. That is, until I met a guy who broke me out of my shell. I met him at a club, we went back to our hostel and started making out. Prude Marni kicked in. I clenched and got uncomfortable. He noticed my quick change in behavior and said to me “I want you to be comfortable. If I do anything that makes you nervous or uncomfortable, just slap my hand and I will stop immediately.” I can tell you there was no hand slapping that night and I quickly got rid of my childhood nickname.

#3 Tell Her EXACTLY What You Want.

It drives me wild when a man tells me exactly what he wants to do to me. It’s exciting and sexy. Be a man, say exactly what you want, and you’ll get to beat around the bush, but in a very different way 😉

#4 Pay Her A REAL Compliment, Not An Exaggerated One.

Give a woman a REAL compliment about her inner core rather than her exterior. Evolutionary psychologists show that women are programmed to be skeptical of what men say. It’s their way of protecting themselves from manipulative men who don’t want to commit to relationships. The more a compliment is tailored to that specific woman, the more intimate and effective it is says Tammy Nelson Ph.D.

#5 Treat Her Like A Lady.

Whether it’s for a one-night stand or for a partner of 6 years, no woman wants to feel like she’s a slut, a whore or a stupid female that’s been used.  Make sure to treat every woman with respect. Be honest, don’t manipulate and treat her like a lady.

#6 Whip Out Your…

Intelligence. Now this may just be me but I get a “hard on” for men who are uber intelligent. Not the arrogant ones who want to attempt to school me on how much they know. The ones that just seem to know about stuff and talk about it with confidence and authority.

#7 Tease Her In Public.

I’m not talking about pulling her hair and telling her she smells. I’m talking about being covertly inappropriate while out in public. For example, while sitting across the table from friends, talking about politics, slide your fingers up her thigh and just around her underwear line. Do this for about 15 seconds and then remove your hand. Do a couple of these in a night and she’ll attack you as soon as you walk in the door.

#8 Bring Out Your Inner Caveman.

Nothing puts me in the mood faster than when I can feel my man craving me. “Women love to feel the desire of a man they’re into. Give your girl an unexpected, passionate kiss.  Grab her hair – gently – and run your hands through it as your lips lock.  And when dinners over, pick her up over your shoulder, carry her into the bedroom, and toss her onto the bed.  A little spank won’t hurt along the way.” – Christian Hudson, The Social Man

#9 Start Flirting At 9am.

Anticipation is one of the most amazing aphrodisiacs. Send her 3-4 texts throughout the day telling her what you are going to do to her in the evening. Tell her how hot she is, that she turns you on and then tell her you like it when she does X.  X is the thing that is unique to just her so that she knows your lines aren’t canned.

One Note: Don’t get offended if she does not respond right away or even at all.  Many women are not comfortable with this type of forwardness because they don’t know how to respond. Just keep going. This shows her you are comfortable being sexual and she can be too!

#10 Touch Her Slowly!!!!!! 

I just got shivers writing this one. Nothing turns me on more than when a man slowly touches me all over my body. Starting with a light massage of my feet. Then working up the leg to the inner portion of my thighs. Moving on to caressing the sides of my belly and chest and ending by brushing my back and neck with his lips. Amazing!

In fact, there’s an actual step-by-step way to touch a woman so that you can amplify her arousal with every single touch…

And if you get off course…it could INSTANTLY turn her off.

I wanna make sure you know EXACTLY how to push ALL her hot buttons…so that you not only get her “in the mood”…but you also get her ripping off your clothes, dragging you to bed, and screaming over the best sex of her LIFE 😉

Sound good?

Good because I’ve enlisted the help of renowned Sexpert Darrah De Jour to help take your bedroom game to the next level…

Check out Let’s Talk Sex with Darrah De Jour now

I’ve created an unedited, uncensored, EXTREMELY DETAILED recording of myself and Darrah talking about what we want sexually from men.

Here are just a few things we cover:

– How to calm a woman so that she is open to doing what you want in the bedroom

– The exact “treasure map” on how to touch a woman (how long, where to touch)

– How to take things “up a notch” sexually


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  1. skw // January 11, 2012 at 10:30 am

    “#6 Whip Out Your…

    Intelligence. Now this may just be me but I get a “hard on” for men who are ubber intelligent. Not the arrogant ones who want to attempt to school me on how much they know. The ones that just seem to know about stuff and talk about it with confidence and authority.”

    maybe you can distinguish the difference between arrogant ones and confident ones?

    I know about a lot of stuff. A LOT. Im a smart mother f*cker. but somehow I don’t think I should be dancing in the club, and whisper into her ears:

    “hey wanna come back to my place, and we can talk about echo reduplication and it’s morphosyntactic construction, both in noun-phrase coreferencing as well as prepositional modalities?”

    • YouareAloser // December 6, 2012 at 9:19 pm

      Ya, not that smart. Nobody care about whatever you just said. Sorry, acquire some intelligence that is actually useful.

    • Bro // January 4, 2013 at 2:09 pm

      You’re an idiot

    • Guestasauras // March 18, 2013 at 6:46 pm

      Ok, you’re smart, but the stuff you mentioned she won’t care about, she wants to know how you navigate in the world, how you handle tough decisions, difficult people and awkward situations. Tell some stories about how you keep your wits about you when others struggle, and show your compassionate and don’t make it sound like your bragging, just relating.

    • Coreferencing Carl // April 12, 2013 at 4:44 pm

      Skw, I know I’m not your type, but I just got a chub for the “prepositional modalities” thingie.

  2. skw // January 11, 2012 at 10:32 am

    “It drives me wild when a man tells me exactly what he wants to do to me. It’s exciting and sexy. Be a man, say exactly what they want, and you’ll get to beat around the bush, but in a very different way ”

    Marni, I want to come over and have intercourse with you at your next available time.

    Did it work?

  3. Parkey // January 11, 2012 at 4:23 pm

    Just come back from a dance class, which basically involved me moving a lot of beautiful twentysomething women around a dance floor using close physical contact.

    It’s a great way to learn a lot of this stuff. #3 in particular, but telling her exactly what to do with a physical lead rather than with words.

  4. christofer // January 11, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    Marni,some interesting and helpful tips IF
    you have a partner.A lot of us wish there
    was a woman in our lives that we could
    apply all of this to.

    Regarding #7 Teasing in public…You don’t
    suggest trying this on a first date;More
    appropriate in an established relationship ?

    • Marni Wing Girl // January 13, 2012 at 3:00 am

      Hey Christofer,

      yes you’re right this one for a girl that you’ve already hooked up with

      Marni 🙂

    • Guestasauras // March 18, 2013 at 6:49 pm

      Yeah, but you can tease a first date appropriately without creeping her out, you can do it without the touching or sexual overtones, keep it PG13 and see what comes back to you.

  5. Kevin // January 12, 2012 at 1:13 am

    This is great but most of us here are single.

  6. Parkey // January 12, 2012 at 4:11 am

    Chances are you’re not going to be single forever.

  7. skw // January 12, 2012 at 7:17 am

    Ever heard of putting the cart before the horse?

    This is like putting the down payment on a 800 space cart-storage facility with a $1500 alarm system before the horse.

  8. Donovan // March 26, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    Whew, that was great. You say most women would like those things? I do think I have done most those things, except for the talking dirty/texting dirty. And I *have* been very appreciated as a result. My difficulty has been getting to that point however…I stink at approaching. And yes, slow is a magical thing. Sex, like everything, can become meditation: slow, conscious of posture and feeling. We can let go somewhat of the pursuit of orgasm a discover a world of energy and the many ways it can move/be moved…but both need to feel safe to relax that much.

  9. Will-yum // September 20, 2012 at 1:21 pm

    Hold on a minute – let me whip this out…
    “The thing that blocks or stops a women from enjoying sexual/sensual experiences is that thing on her shoulders…”
    I agree… if we could just remove that pesky little thing…
    Just kidding! lol… or am I?
    Really though, this list is bang-on Marni.
    Aaannnddd… I got shivers just reading about you getting the shivers just writing about being -correctly- touched all over your body.
    After reading this post I want to start immediately applying these ‘ways’, cuz I got a pretty good feeling that their going to make a difference.
    Anticipay-a-yay-a-tion. (As the song goes)

    • Marni Wing Girl // September 25, 2012 at 5:44 pm

      Thanks Will (I think 😉

      I hope the tips on how to create that all important anticipation and build up really help you to give tons of women the shivers 😉


  10. armin // January 30, 2016 at 7:44 am

    #7 tease her in public
    I remember a couple of years a ago when I read David de
    Angelo stuffs about don’t be a nice guy, tease her… I tried to tease a
    hot girl, but instead I was rude and impolite and messed up totally 🙂
    nothing wrong with David, I didn’t get the idea.

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  12. Albert Giesbrecht // January 20, 2018 at 6:17 pm

    I guess that would work for old married couples like Ray and Debora Barone, not those on a first date. Mind you I have done the touching thing and got called out on it.